Monday, June 11, 2012

Facing Fears... Home Alone! :(

This who I am... a "realist" or... as some like to call it "pessimistic realist"... my husband can't stand this trait of mine and I know that he'll have no patience whatsoever for me if I say anything at all about the surgery. Especially considering we're going to be paying money that we don't have for it. Sigh... 

So please indulge me in this hopefully short and pathetic "fear fest" while my three boys are away having fun at a water park (surgery precluded me from going. I am slightly happy for saving the money, but... my situation is not ideal for being alone right now).


- the long drive, being too exhausted, the danger inherent in driving which will be basically tripled (every day when I drive back home I think about how dangerous it is to drive a car, but we often don't think about the risk);

- having permanent damage to my eyes, like some astigmatism (I know, I should have given more thoughts to the risks before the surgery, not after);

- losing this new job after one year and not having the old one anymore;

- continuing problems using the computer/looking at screens or the slight glare and that I'm experiencing now (this one makes me despair because I generally use the computer a lot, both for work and for leisure);

- the challenges of the new job and the feeling of intimidation of being at a more prestigious place (this is actually not a bad thing at all, right?);

yeah... I'm sure there are more, but so far, this is a pretty short fear-fast, aren't you glad?

Now I'm going to try and watch a film or two... even though the subtitles (which I don't completely need, since I know French, but which I read anyway) are slightly out of focus/ "glare-y."

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