Another Nay

So, the answer is no again (on that opportunity, which was, I should have realized, not really that, but a distant possibility which now became a "failed opportunity"). I did speak much too soon, unfortunately. They're keeping his resume in case they ever need it again. I guess that won't help much in the position that is open in yet another department...

Oh well, and so we carry on...

I'm still struggling with the online gig. I've been losing sleep over it, literally for the hours spending grading and also in the more abstract sense of being stressed out, agonizing over the whole thing. I wrote on my journal about it last Saturday night (OK, it was already Sunday, at around 3 a.m.) -- I just couldn't sleep because I was just so frustrated! I might go back to it and try to transpose some of my reflections there to here.

In my post on Friday I said precisely the opposite of what I've been often thinking. I wrote: " Oh well, I need to succeed in this [online gig] anyway, I owe it to myself not to fail. " But what I struggled terribly with last Saturday night was the idea that I have to give myself permission to fail this, but it's just so hard!!

Ok, I have to grade some assignments, so I have to go. Hopefully, I will be able to come back and post before my trip.

P.S. today is my brother's birthday, BTW, and I wasn't able to talk to him! :-( Good thing he has good friends from Brazil visiting him in NZ, so he's probably busy and happy there. I'll write him an email. Right now. Before grading.