Thanksgiving in Michigan... thinking of other bloggers during trip

I'm still grieving and upset, but I am actively choosing to avoid listening to or reading the news. I feel a knot in my stomach just by looking at email updates from Time magazine (we're still print subscribers) and thinking about their (now dreaded for me) "person of the year" issue. Sigh... My dear friend wrote very poignantly a couple of days ago about the thought of "empty tomorrows." I've always looked forward to future days, but right now it's hard to look into the unpredictable future that awaits those living in this country. OK, moving on from that, this is supposed to be an "Update" post and those are often cheery.

Last week we traveled to a place close to Michigan's Southwestern shore to spend Thanksgiving with K's cousin D who is finishing his master's degree there. D and his wife are expecting a baby girl (due Jan. 1st) and it was very nice to spend time with them. We did a quick side trip to Chicago on Friday and we played lots of board game. Their friends had a potluck Thanksgiving celebration at the house of their friend who is a pretty well-known Brazilian food blogger (I'm linking to her Christmas dinner "post" so you can see some of the decorations that were actually used in our dinner. I have photos, maybe I'll include some of them later). It was nice, and I was the one providing all of the "traditional" American Thanksgiving touches: cranberry sauce (I had made "only" 14 quarts of cranberry sauce for my son's elementary school banquet last week and I had taken leftovers), the Yams with Pecan Praline (a recipe I posted TEN YEARS ago!), roasted Brussels sprouts, and butternut squash "pudding" (crust-less pie).

What I really wanted to blog about, though, is that during the whole trip I kept thinking of the bloggers and former bloggers who live (or grew up) in places not too far from our route or from our destination. When we drove around Pittsburgh and into Ohio, I thought of Jenna who grew up there. Then, when I saw the sign for Fort Wayne I thought of my friend and former blogger Professing Mama. And when we went to Chicago I thought of Doctor Mama Esquire who lives there now, and of Jamie who is not that far away. I still want to meet these women! And I really miss all those who quit blogging along the way and who are one of the main reasons I'm on facebook a lot.

OK, gotta go because I have lots to do! I have one week of classes left (YAY!) and I have tons of grading to do. Hopefully I'll blog more in the coming days. 19 more posts to get to my "116" total for 2016. Yeah, I'm doing that, just to be cute. That was the main reason why I skipped "NaBloPoMo" for the first time in 9 years (with the exception of 2012 when I wrote only 25 times in November) -- very silly, right? In a way I'm glad I wasn't blogging daily. There would have been lots of anguish and despair about the election. Sigh... 2016 was a crazy year, that's for sure! :-(   

Still Grieving and Anxious about this Unprecedented Election... It's Scary to be in Uncharted Territory!

A few things I haven't shared in the blog, if you're my facebook friend (which you're welcome to be!) you've seen the first one:

• Last Wednesday it was tough to teach. I was stunned and upset and students were too. Students were crying. One Asian(-American) young woman cried non-stop for 10 minutes or more. I think she was trying to control herself, but I after I started the class speaking English to them, saying that I was going to let them speak about the election for a bit (and do some "therapy"), so I think that motivated her not to hold it in and just cry. I mentioned something about this kind of happening before when Al Gore lost and so they earnestly asked me what had happened in 2000, so I pulled information about that and showed it to them (it was heartbreaking to think about that too). And when I switched to Portuguese the review grammar lesson I'd planned was actually about the election too. In the second section nobody was crying, but they teared up when I mentioned the student who cried. It seems all of my students were in agreement, outraged, and confused. If anyone disagreed they were quiet and didn't let it show at all.

• On Wednesday night my 12 year old was worried and asked whether the fact that we're not citizens yet (more on that in another post, my husband is now against becoming a citizen) meant that they could kick us out of the country. "What would happend to me?" he wondered. I suppose they could deny the renewal of our green-cards, but I feel that's unlikely, unless maybe we become activists or something -- which I totally wanted to do, not to be kicked out of the country, of course, but just because it would feel useful. Sigh... In any case, how many millions of children are legitimately scared about this possibility? And what about the thousands (700K) of young people on DACA?

• My husband was so troubled, particularly on Thursday morning. He wasn't sleeping well and was very upset, like I have seen him very few times.

•  I have been spending way too much time on Facebook -- thankfully a tiny percentage of people I'm in touch with there has unsavory things to say about the election. In a way it felt like a huge support group, but after a while the negativity builds up and it gets a bit toxic. I have to try to not be on facebook that much. I'm glad I was on and saw my friend Sarah mention that the opening of SNL had been great, so I didn't miss Dave Chappelle's great show.

• It took me a while to be able to stomach listening to the news (I don't watch news, I only listen to NPR) and I am planning on avoiding as much as possible seeing or listening to the voice of that man. During SNL's Weekend Update I actually covered part of the TV screen so I wouldn't see his face. That's another reason why I should stay off Facebook.

I'm sure there would be lots more to say, but I just wanted to finish by saying that the worst part of all this is the "unprecedented" and "uncharted territory" -- it's impossible to foresee what's going to happen! Not only because this has never happened -- the election of a completely unprepared person who seems to be actually unwilling to do the actual work of POTUS, but also because of his unpredictable ways. Everyone is saying that they would "love to be wrong," but right now there is still lots of reasons to fear.

I hope we're wrong, but something tells me, deep down, that it won't be good. I can't be good. And... what if this creature is reelected? What if? :-(

There are just too many worries and concerns. It's hard to stop grieving and move on. What about the environment? Foreign relations? the Middle East & Syria and the refuge crisis? What about the immigrants (including me)? What about marriage equality and access to contraceptives and Roe vs. Wade? And the Affordable Care Act?

Let's all hope we're wrong, that our fears are unfounded, I'm sure everyone would love to be proven wrong. Sigh...

The Dystopian Future is Here :-(

Although I hope I may be wrong. I'd LOVE to be wrong, really!! I never hoped so much in my life that I may be wrong about my gut feelings and impressions about "this man" and his upcoming "regime" (which is what he called the current presidency). This hasn't been funny for a long time, but now it's downright despair-inducing and terrifying.

This is what I wrote on facebook at 1:52 am on election night. I tried to post this from my phone multiple times yesterday morning, but I think the Blogger app is broken:

The dystopian future that literature has been warning about for years and years is here. The Brave New World of 1984, Fahrenheit 451, The Handmaid's Tale, Parable of the Sower, and, more recently, The Hunger Games is closer to reality. Go read those books if you haven't and let's prepare for a new reality in which facts may not matter anymore and prejudices speak louder than reason.

(I taught these classic "dystopian fiction" books multiple times as a teaching assistant and I learned to love the genre, these books are important, especially now! It's just kind of sad that they make me realize all that could happen if extremists ideas are carried out to their full extent.)

Thankfully most people weren't online, or I might have gotten a handful of negative comments, so that didn't happen. In any case, I with I had received more comments from like-minded people, but I decided not to re-post my thoughts yesterday. Just because I have a few people as "friends" who disagree with me and because I feel very unsafe on facebook, although I've spent many many hours there in the past two days.

I stayed up to the bitter end, on election night. I took screenshots on my phone of the unbelievable progression of NYT's graphs and charts. I also took photos of the TV screen, as it was so unbelievable -- Trump saying his victory speech while most of the networks hadn't still called his victory (not even Fox, at first). It was very surreal.

I didn't have a chance to finish watching Hillary's concession speech from yesterday (my brother- and sister-in-law facetimed us from Canada as we were watching the broadcast online and K spent a long time talking to them and explaining it). I haven't read many pieces on the elections, I have, though, read what most of my friends on facebook had to say.

I unfollowed a few people during the election, a couple of which ended up commenting back to me on other people's threads recently. I have spent some time trying gently to tell some people to be more sensitive (this one woman I know was saying the protesters should "grow up and get over it."

Sigh... There are too many thoughts in my head right now. I hope to write a couple more posts to share them and do "cheap therapy." Oh, yeah...

Last, but not least, if you're a Back to the Future fan the way our family is, you'll know that yesterday we woke up on the alternate 1985 and Biff Tannen is in charge, check out the image in this tweet. Sigh...

We need to find a way to fix it, too bad we can't travel back in time!

Oh no! Is she going to lose?????

What some people are saying is that this countryside INCREDIBLY sexist, even more than it is racist. 

Sigh...

Unbelievable. And the two third party candidates seem to be doing real harm. :-(

10:20 NYT says 80% chance of Trump winning! :-(

NaBloPoMo?

I guess that maybe I'm going to try blogging daily in November once more, although that will defeat this recent idea I had of maybe posting 116 times this year (to look cute, since I can't possibly reach 216). Writing every day in November will take me to 123. ;-P

Oh well, maybe I'll change my mind so I can do 116 posts.

More tomorrow!

Quick "Hi" & ULTRA Busy Weekend Recap

I'm alive, just busy. Maybe not as overwhelmed, due to the fact that I'm working less and one other thing I will hopefully blog about at some point.

I've started at least one link-filled post about laundry (last Sunday!) and in the end didn't finish. The funny thing is that I'm doing laundry right now, and will have to be up until the wash is done and I can stick it all in the drier (so I should go finish that post! but I won't).

OK, yeah, lame post. Just to recap the last week: I began shopping for the once a semester dinner that I cook for all my students (40-50 people!) a week ago. Then I started preparing some of the food ahead of time to freeze. More shopping followed on Thursday & Friday.

The weekend started with a BANG: an event at church which involved the 200 students of the boarding academy my son attends (as a day student); then we had friends for lunch the next day after church (something our sons had been asking for, given that this other family's son is my one of my eldest son's closets friends). Then Saturday night there was an event at the elementary school. K dropped our youngest son off and I went an hour later, but managed to escape and (just because I was super busy and had to continue cooking for the next day's dinner...  HAHAHA!) I took my eldest son to town to shop for some clothes because I had a couple of coupons and he really needs/wants a suit. We hit Kohls and Target and came back, and I cooked until 1 am.

I did sleep in on Sunday (till 9!) even though I shouldn't have, but my husband was coming with me to help me with the dinner for the first time in 4.5 years, so I indulged. We had to make sure we had arranged rides for both sons who had, respectively, a soccer game (for which we were providing snacks) & a "barn party" at school, and we were successful with those arrangements. K drove and I sent a bunch of frantic last minute emails to students about parking and reminders.

It went really well, even though my colleague (formerly "new hire" here in the blog) forgot about the event and did not show up! Two graduate students came as well as a few former-students, including one who drove from out of town (U#1) and invited two late-coming guests.

We made it back home and I didn't have to stay at my friends' house!

Guess what we're going this week/weekend -- are we taking it easy and doing low-key stuff?

ABSOLUTELY NOT, we're crazy, that's who we are. We're driving to the D.C. area tomorrow to spend about 15-6 hours with my mother-in-law since she's there with a tour group. Then we come back home and... wait for it! Drive to Philly for the weekend. In spite of a soccer game on Sunday, I'm not really in a rush to get back. We'll see, if we miss soccer it's fine...

Yeah, and I should be working now (preparing exams), and here I am, blogging, of course!

First Red! ;-) :-/

Most of the post was written while I was getting my pedicure. 

K and I are flying to LA tomorrow to attend a friend's wedding on Monday (this is the year of friends' weddings galore!). It's crazy to do a whirlwind trip like this in the middle of the semester, but hopefully it will be a nice getaway for the two of us.

I bought a dress yesterday (at Anthropologie, on clearance!) 

and today I picked nail polish colors to match. I had never done red before and I love it! 

Except that I just walked inside mg house carrying a large Costco pizza, my backpacks, and some bags, and... I bumped into one of the brick steps and chipped my one hour old pedicure!!!!!! :-(

So frustrating! 

The fingernails are lighter and I hope they won't chip before Monday! 

Sigh...
ETA:
P.S. Jen, I'm sorry I did my nails without you, I never do that! ;-) ;-P  But I think you weren't done at work yet! Oh, and I also went to Tammy's instead of Holly. They're a tad more expensive, but I think they're a bit better! (and their chairs most definitely work). Still creepy old men, sigh... :-/

I can't believe I didn't have a "Fluff" label!! Hahahaha, created!

Another 12 Hour Day

They are much less frequent now (YAY!), but once in a while I still pull out a 12-hour-day out of the house. 

Sometimes (ok, often) not because of work, but because I go shopping or browsing, but today I really did work late, past 5:30 pm. 

Glad to have just arrived home, though! 

Blogroll mostly back

I spent some time today trying to remember as best as I could the blogs that were in my now-gone blogroll and I think that I was able to do it for the most part.

This brought home the sad realization that there are very few people left in "blogland" and most people aren't posting anymore. :-(

oh well... I do this mostly for myself, so I'm still here.

All the Music Ever (OK, Almost!) ;-)

We resisted, I resisted...

Digital music is/was not my thing. I like to buy/own CDs, I love to read the liner notes. I want to know what year songs were written -- ok, that last part is generally available online. I like to OWN my music, but not paying track by track and I was outraged at the idea to pay a monthly fee for music, for video, for anything. So we've been using Spotify free for as long as it's been available (I think we began using it the day it came out or the day after -- for a few things we're early adopters).

In addition to Spotify, I did buy a few digital albums here and there in the past few years. I bought some CDs too (mostly when the music was not available digitally) and really cheap in Brazil (on my birthday).

A few months ago, though, our teenager began to pay monthly for a Google Play/YouTube Red membership, out of his own money (which he actually needs to pay for his Minecraft server and other things) and it didn't make any sense not to upgrade to a family membership, it just didn't...

(I also did some research, mostly by reading this very thorough comparison of Google Play, Spotify & Apple Music) 

So last weekend my husband got the family membership and just now I accessed it for the first time and began to add albums. I've had the app on my phone for a while, but haven't used.

And, you know...

... as much as I hate to admit it, I think this is going to work! ;-) It will be tremendous time-suck to have access to nearly all the music ever, but I think it'll be great.

I just found last year's album by my favorite (OK, I have many favorites!) Brazilian singer, Ivan Lins, that I hadn't known about before. And look at that album art, gorgeous!

So, yeah... let me go back to cleaning the family room with some lovely samba/Brazilian music in the background. I seriously want to print out this album art for my office!!

I now don't like NBC but l'm still watching SNL

And thankfully the debate spoof wasn't that terrible. I think SNL doesn't have much influence in the electorate, does it? I really enjoyed all previous elections (since I started watching SNL).

Oh, they finally have a Hispanic woman, wow! 

Hmmm... Have they ever had any Asian of any gender? 

Anyway, I keep watching and not finishing this post...

(BTW, it's the first show my 14 year old is watching with us (after all, it's PG-14)

... But the "Family Feud" game show political edition was really funny! With a bonus Daryl Hammond as Bill Clinton. 

Ok, that's it for unintentionally live-blogging SNL tonight. ;-P

ETA: I really disliked Weekend Update! They were trying to be equally negative about both... Not really funny. 

Ok, to be fair the black vs white banter between Colin & Michael was good/funny  & Kenan Thompson's David Ortiz was HILARIOUS!! I love, love, love Kenan!!

Just because my mom begged me to. :-)

And now for a little fluff... While I slowly rebuild my blog roll... :-/

I'm actually using "wrinkle cream". Sigh... My mom actually just meant that I should use some good hydrating cream, but I may as well try. It won't hurt is all I say... And I refuse to spend hundreds on stuff I don't really believe in, so I'll  just stick to the inexpensive brands. (My plan is to try different ones).

Favorite Blogs List and Feed is GONE!! :-( WHY?

Well... it looks like blogging really will have to be over soon for me or I will have to move to another platform. If I can't use my blog to get the feed of my friends' blogs, then what's the use of it?

I'm trying to understand what's going on, but just last night I checked the blogs listed on my side-bar and now they are gone. Do I need to add them back up from memory? Searching for each blog? :-(

Maybe it's a temporary problem (this has happened once before and after a day or so the blogroll was back in place, to my relief), but maybe it's not, since there's a message saying that my "HTTPS" settings have been changed in the blog.

Whatever is going on, it's pretty distressing, annoying, and is making me sad. And nobody will read this if their own blogrolls are gone! :-(

I just checked Jo(e)'s blog and her list of a few blogs from her blogroll is still there! Why is mine gone? (says she pouting).

Well... ridiculous 21st century problem, right? It still disrupts my life, though. A small part of it, but it does.

And I didn't even intend to be blogging, just came here to check if there were any new posts from friends to read.

OK, before I go, I'll start making a new blogroll from scratch and see if this one will be gone too!

So Much to Blog About, So Little...

... I don't know... time to sit down at the computer because I've been RIDICULOUSLY productive for the past three days?

Seriously, though, I have. And I will even have some video footage to prove it, although when it's turned into a time-lapse it will become a few seconds of work. Hopefully more on that someday soon.

I have tons of things to "talk" about over here. Mostly with myself, I guess, but I know that one or two people sometimes comment, which is nice!

So, yeah, I will try as much as possible to come back and blog more. Not just desperate politically motivated posts. We need some fluff! And some serious ADHD discussion. (really? maybe).

Hyperventilating Until After Election Day

I couldn't bring myself to watch the debate. I followed from afar, just through a few if my friends on Facebook and the handful of people I follow on Twitter (including Michael Moore whom I love).

I have this constant feeling that I'm hyperventilating when I think of the election. I despair thinking that there is an unbelievable chance that I could be feeling the same way for four years -- please don't let that happen, you folks who can vote!!! I've never felt so powerless in my life not being able to vote yet!

I feel so discouraged! I wish i could have the guts to tell the people in my church and school community that I wish they would just abstain from voting, because in this election, I'm feeling personally attacked. If these people vote for him, they are voting against me -- an immigrant and a woman. :-(

In the past, Republican candidates were, for the most part, "normal," respectable, reasonable men. That is not the case now. Drumpf is neither of those things, quite the contrary. If he were only an ill-prepared 6 time bankrupt businessman who does not have any concrete plans would be bad, but he is a bigot, a racist, a mysogynist, a narcissist, a joke*! :-(

How could this be happening? I ask myself over and over! It's not funny, it hasn't been funny for a while now.  I'm DREADING the start of SNL. Making fun of this election is SACRILEGIIOUS! I think that after watching that Samantha Bee denouncement of NBC I cannot watch this channel anymore (the only one I've turned in sporadically for SNL or the Olympics) with a clear conscience.

I just wanted to go to sleep and wake up on Nov. 9 to good news. 

Please, if you're a conservative, would you consider abstaining from voting?

* He makes Sarah Paling seem almost endearing. 

My 2016 Sountrack: Coldplay's _Ghosts Stories_

The year hasn't ended yet, but I want to record this here...

Before the holidays last year I somehow "discovered" Coldplay's sad, nostalgic, "break-up" album, Ghost Stories and I became obsessed with it (I don't know how I didn't come across it earlier -- I'm just not that much into pop music, but Colplay -- which I know some people hate -- I love!).

I really wanted to have been able to buy Target's deluxe edition album that came with three bonus tracks, but it was no longer available. (Yes, I still buy CDs on occasion, that is about to change because we've decided to get a family subscription to Google Play & I cannot believe I'm having to surrender to digital/streaming music!) :-(

So, these are my absolute favorites, although it's hard to choose:
1. "O" or "Fly On"

2. "Oceans"


3. "Always in My Head"

4. "True Love"

5. "A Star Full of Skies" (SERIOUSLY, that's what I said one day in the car to my sons, and then I followed it with "A Dream Full of Heads." They laughed and laughed at their crazy silly mama!), ooops, "Sky Full of Stars"


I'm not super crazy for Magic, Midnight & Another's Arms, but I like them OK enough to have wanted to buy the whole album. Thankfully, I've been able to listen to it offline thanks to Amazon Prime, but my son assures us that Google has way more music. I guess I need to trust what he's saying!

Hi?

Writer's block?

Frustration with little things in life? (Yes: weeds in garden, poor plants never planted and almost dying. Soon it will be too late for them).

Busy? Yes... but the good "new normal" busy that I really want to write more about soon.

I haven't given up blogging, nope. I'm just a die-hard fan of the genre that "changed my life" -- too bad it's not what younger people like.

OK, I hope to do a real update soon, but for now this "throwaway post" will have to do.

:-)

137

that very predictable day in which I debate the possibility of reaching a "cute matchy" number of posts this year: 216.

I've made it in the past two years, but this is the year I've written the least posts so far. By this time last year, I had only about 83 posts to go (I'd written 132 posts by the end of August, this year only 75).

Nah, I don't think I will try to accomplish this useless feat this year...

And I was reading about this new platform, Medium, where posts look gorgeous, but I'm sure I could never move this behemoth blog over there, so I'll just stay here for now.

P.S. I'm pretty positive I've lost all the gorgeous photos I took on May 31st in New York City. Unless I copied them to my mom's computer. My only hope. I don't even recall having looked at those photos. Maybe at my parents' house? Maybe? My sadness is great, but so is my numbness and indifference in a way... what does it matter? Who even cares? I know my son will be upset... but he's partly to blame because he's ALWAYS, CONSTANTLY at the computer, preventing me from downloading the photos from the cards.

I still cannot believe that may have happened.

Conflicted feelings about this 15th anniversary

Five  years ago I wrote a nice post about 9/11, but I feel so conflicted now. It's a particularly bad moment in the history of this country. One that I hope to look back to in months and years ahead and be glad that it's over. Because if that man becomes president, wow... I don't know... it's just unimaginable, but so very possible.

(and the worst possible moment to be filling a citizenship application. I know, it's a ridiculous way to tell you about it as well, but whatever, now you know)

Things that make me upset: The reports about all the 9/11 responders are dying of cancer and suffering from other ailments. How plausible the arguments made by the Architects and Engineers for 9/11 Truth are (Am I going to be surveilled by the government from now on for writing this?). How the consequences of the Iraq war are still haunting the world to this day.

Too many things. I was going to share some photos of the Ground Zero memorial, but I can't find them in my external hard drive and now I'm stressed (thinking I may have lost some amazing photos of that day back in May. Sigh...).

Yeah, it's a crazy world and I have no words or energy to go into it right now.

Not very productive day

Most boring post title ever? Yeah, probably. Nothing like a day after the other, right? :-P

It's almost 6 pm and I haven't cooked the huge batch of tomato sauce that I planned to (although I still want to do it) and I tried to do the last of the few things my husband asked me to do (to pay the water bill in the city offices) and... well... I got there half an hour late! :-(

And... I haven't yet sent the emails that I needed to send my students. BOOOOO! I hope to do that in the next few minutes and then... I'll go tackle that box of tomatoes. Peeling, seeding, sauteing with onions & garlic.

I did wash a couple of loads of laundry (which, in fact, makes me more contrary than happy, more on that when I blog about school uniforms!) and... took a bunch of donations to a community service place.

And read a bit.

Sigh. Not too happy today. Super productive days set a bar too high to keep up with! ;-P

Super Productive Day?

Let's see what was accomplished. Maybe a list would be best, but here is the day's chronology:

- put load of laundry to wash;
- drove hubby to work (20 minutes away, to the South);
- went to Costco and bought only what was on my list (good accomplishment!): a pineapple, cat food, and toilet paper;
- returned plastic drawers that didn't fit inside bathroom cabinets I'm trying to organize;
- purchased metal shelving that maybe will fit and cubes for cube storage shelves we already have in the living room and family room;
- went to farmer's market (I'm buying tomatoes like crazy to make sauce and freeze)

- drove back home and hung laundry, put another load to wash;
- picked up oldest child early from school and began arranging the cube storage (metal shelves didn't fit cabinets :( so I put them back in the trunk to return);
- picked up youngest son and took both boys to the dentist (20 mins. North).
- took oldest to store while youngest had teeth cleaned to buy deodorant and acne stuff;
- drove back home, first dropping oldest at school for him to work;
- stopped by the "Main street" hairdresser who was free and had time to quickly cut youngest son's hair;
- at home, hung second load of laundry (it was pretty late, after 4 pm, but the day was hot and windy, so it was ok) -- first load was completely dry;
- picked up oldest and, after a few minutes at home, drove him to another hair salon for his scheduled haircut appointment.
- picked the now dry clothes and drove with youngest son to town (20 mins. South);
- son's glasses were adjusted at the store & I bought a t-shirt and fragrance spray for oldest at popular store with teens (NEVER thought I'd give in and shop there, name begins with H); bought pretzel sticks as reward for patient kid.
- picked up  husband and drove back to the elementary school where son had forgotten homework and nice teacher met us and opened the door.
- finally back home! Only leftovers for everyone, not real dinner today.

I needed to have written emails to students and done other kinds of work, but I guess that in the parenting and house fronts the day was productive! I'll try to add some photos. :)

Lost notes recovered

Last week, on the first day I went to University #2 (where I now exclusively work, we'll keep University #1 for my husband's place of work, my former "adjuncting to no end" grounds) I finally deleted U#1's email account (ou outlook) from my phone so I could add U#2's email.

I felt triumphant, and symbolically, it was my last act, it was when I finally cut the cords with that institution.

Except that the next morning I discovered that the bulk of my iPhone Notes were GONE!! Hundreds of some really important notes: favorite recipes, stats from my sons' well-child visits from the past three years, passwords to my kids' iPads, notes from my ADHD therapy. It was all gone.

Well, not really! It was all stored in my outlook email account with U#1 and I found them all safe and sound a few days later. There was one problem: how to recover them? I knew that if I deleted the email account for U#2 and re-established U#1 I'd get them back, HOWEVER:

1) I don't need U#1's email anymore, I only need U#2's! (the iPhone doesn't allow two Outlook/Exchange accounts on the same phone).

2) How would I transfer the notes to another account, like "iCloud" once I got them back? I couldn't find an answer to that online.

So...

I spent a few hours COPYING each date and note by hand to several emails to myself on gmail and, this morning, for good measure, I also saved them by year (2014, 15, 16) into Word documents. I intend to copy and paste several of them back into Notes, since I need them, I just know that this will be time consuming.

I had lots of fun copying the VERY RANDOM notes I had and was even able to find a few songs I'd heard on NPR and frantically recorded the program and the time on my Notes (if it's on Morning Edition or All Things Considered it's VERY easy to find the songs they play a few seconds of).

Yeah, one of those things that only a completely OBSESSED person like me would do, no? Yeah, I'm crazy, I know. But I like myself this way. ;-P

P.S. hyperfocus helps A LOT with these random useless tasks!

First Week & the New Normal

I want to write a post about the "new normal" that will be mostly about the way we feel and how life continues after an unexpected and close encounter with death, but that will be at another time.

This was the first week back at work and my husband came back on Monday (that was great, third time we are apart & back together, but also bittersweet, since he had just gone through such a heartbreaking time in Brazil). My brother-, sister-in-law and nephews left and flew back to Cairo on Tuesday.

I had gone to work on Monday, but I taught for the first time on Wednesday and... in spite of how exhausted I continue to feel after my mega-commute of 88 miles each way... I am THRILLED, beyond excited and amazed at the fact that I have Tuesdays and Thursdays ALL TO MY OWN SELF!!! That's also part of the glorious new normal of my new work contract. I'm sure that it will greatly increase my quality of life, not to mention the quality of my teaching!

So, yeah... after an exhausting week of double-single parent and constant Olympic Games watching we had the first full week of school for the boys and first week for me. K starts next week. Yeah, the new-normal is soon going to be in full-swing.

I hope to fully enjoy this weekend and wish that you do too!

Maybe in Four Years...

... My son will be coming to school with me. :-) I hope he gets accepted here! 

The Olympic Games in Rio

Over a month ago I took this photo to show that I was prepared for the Olympic games:

I bought this pair of havaianas.

While in Rio we were in such a rush that we basically didn't take photos with any Rio 2016 signs .:-( I'm slightly sad about that, but bot rweally! ;-)

The games end tomorrow and in spite of the horrific coverage by NBC I watched what I could and enjoyed it

I'll edit this post later! ;-P

On not being there

I just wanted to register here that the memorial service for my father-in-law just took place in Brazil a few hours ago and I am sad because I could not be there.

I hope I can soon talk to my husband, but he just texted me just how to say that that it was really, really hard. :-(

I have this bad feeling that I haven't been able to have much closure following his death because I didn't experience most of it with my husband, his brothers and mother. It's sad that two of the daughters in law couldn't be part of the events of the fateful week and neither one of us four could go to Brazil to be with them now. Sigh...

There's nothing we can do. And there is some likelihood that I may not be with my husband or children when one of my parents dies -- I hope not, but it's not impossible! :-( It's all part of the hardships of being immigrants in another country.  Our own choice.

Double Single Parenting & so much other stuff...

There's a lot on my plate right now. I was supposed to be preparing for classes, having a lighter week with the boys in school and me and my husband doing projects in the house to get us prepared for the school year ahead.

But since our vacation was interrupted followed by the unfortunate and completely unexpected death of my father-in-law things got hectic. I had to pack and travel by myself with the boys (I'm a pro, but I was a pile of nerves). Then we had a relatively quiet week with K3 and his family and K's mom here, sleeping in Kelvin's new bedroom while he slept on the floor (same arrangement in Michigan, incidentally, after we got there). Hopefully being close to her first grandson gave her some comfort.

Our husbands and their mom traveled to Brazil on Monday and these have been tiresome days of "double single parenting" for my sister-in-law and I.

Being by myself on the first week of school -- two different schools now! -- totally sucks! I'm exhausted from waking up earlier than I like (before 7) and doing two drop offs, one before 7:30 am, the other between 8 and 8:15. And then there are the lunches I have to plan... oh, and breakfast, I'm TERRIBLE at breakfast (except for smoothies) and K always feeds the boys in the morning.

Good thing there's the Olympics for us all to watch, but my boys need to be put to bed earlier than they'd like because of school. Thankfully my nephew that is the same age as my youngest son is always nice to his dear cousin and goes to bed at the same time with him (my nephews are sharing a room with my younger son).

On Tuesday was my youngest son's first day of school, a half day, so afterwards I granted his wish and took him and his cousins to a trampoline park an hour away. On the way back SIL commented that she couldn't handle three loud boys in the car. Sigh...Yesterday the cousins joined my son at his school's pool party, but today we had to take the two boys to town because we needed to go shopping.

I haven't been talking enough to my husband, so I'm cranky. I hate missing stuff and I'll miss everything this weekend. Father-in-law's brother and two sisters and their families are coming for the memorial service. I imagine it will be heartbreaking, but I won't be there. I know he's not my dad, but I still wish I could be there. If only to hug my own brokenhearted parents (they lived two blocks away from each other) and my husband.

Some of these feelings are selfish, but this is "blogging as therapy," so I want to share them. I can't wait for my husband to return on Monday! Too bad I have meetings at work for most of the afternoon. I may skip some of them to get home earlier. We'll see.

Thanks for listening!

Brasiiiiilll! Beach volleyball upset over the U.S.

Edited to add: when I wrote this post I didn't know that in "regular" volleyball the Brazilian women had just LOST to China. Some of my friends thought that was a great game to watch. 5 sets X 3 :-)
 
YAY! I slept for most of the game (on the couch while my sister-in-law watched), but got to see the very end. Kerri Walsh-Jennings lost her very first (and last?) Olympic game.

Now I hope the Braziilians Bárbara & Agatha may win the gold!!

And just like that... He grew up!

I want to write more, lots and lots, in fact, about this, such a momentous occasion in my firstborn's life, but here is a quick note not to let these milestones pass without record.

Last Wednesday we went to our son's high school (it's a boarding school in which he will be a "village kid") and submitted his work permit. On Thursday he began work -- in his favorite place, the IT department! I couldn't believe how fast it all went. One day a child, the next technically an adult.

And today was his first day of school as a high-schooler. My baby sure grew up! I'm very proud of him and how much he is maturing and developing every day, but I do feel wistful at times. Transitions like these have surprising effects in one's life. I need to get used to them because milestones will start to pile-up, 8th grade graduation last May was just the beginning!

Grief

post written on the phone (never as good as typing in a computer) ETA on 9/11/16
 
The fields are covered by my favorite flower (see blog header) and we are driving home with our sons and nephews today.

My mother-, brother-, and sister-in-law are staying behind a day or too because my father-in-law is being cremated right now (I was writing this in the morning, it's probably over now) and I feel like crying... The thought is too unbearably sad and there has been no "good" crying or closure for me at all. 

The immediate family and two of my sisters-in-law who were here and who came before he died already have a chance to cry a lot and process it. They all had a chance to say goodbye to him, but I (and my SIL M) didn't and won't. 

I was with my parents in Brazil, who are considerably older than FIL and who were very sad about all of it and fragile (also because he boys and I were leaving, my mom cries and cries every time). So while I was Brazil I had to be strong and couldn't really cry. Of course I cried in the bus and on the plane as soon as we found out FIL had passed away, but I don't know if I will really be able to do much more than that. 

I have been doing my grieving mostly by writing and seeing photos of him and the family. I think it will be a slow process, less dramatic than the one of the wife and sons who went through it all. 

Live with no regrets

My father-in-law passed away peacefully on Thursday. He felt no pain at any point (and he wasn't given any pain medication until the very end) and in the moments in which he was awake from the coma he had many meaningful interactions with his four sons and his wife. They all got to say goodbye and come to terms with him going peacefully, the way he wanted.

During the flight back from Brazil to the  U.S. On Thursday night, I wrote a lengthy post to share on Facebook, which read like a letter to my beloved father-in-law. After I finished writing the post, which ended with me saying I had no regrets at all, I wrote this, which I meant to be shared here:

For me, living intensely is the only way to live without any regrets. There is no need for regrets because you don't ever leave anything behind, as much as possible. You savor each moment, you love deeply, you interact with your loved ones everyday as if that were your last day on earth. You leave nothing unsaid, you open your heart. You even argue if needed, but you patch things up right away and tell people you love them. You kiss, and hug, and caress like there is no tomorrow (I'm like that with my sons and husband, my father in law was just like that too, as is my mom).

You get over the little things that irritate you that don't matter, leave those behind, you put people and family first. You have your friends over and cook their favorite foods for them as often as you can. Work, and a clean and organized house are not that important, making that photo book and giving it to loved ones for a special occasion is (my hubby will hate that one!) As is buying that perfect gift for a friend, taking the time to plan your trip around seeing as many friends as you can then talking all night with them and going out of your way to see them is the way I like to do it. After all, it's only once every few years! (In our case, when we go to Brazil).

Spend money on trips together, even if it's a lot -- travel and time with family is worth more than things. Go to meaningful places, make memories, take endless photos and then look at them later to savor the moments (my husband is against the photo part sometimes, but maybe he has changed his mind now). Eat at places you love and that will make you happy, enjoy treats like ice-cream, gelatto, or popsicles with the kids while on trips or at the mall (just did that with my 14 year old son a few days ago).

Spend time helping people, making things for them for special occasions, even if it involves hours and hours of your time. (I know not many people can do that, but I thrive on it). Put other people's needs ahead of your own, stay behind to help whenever you can. Be last in line at potluck so everyone else can eat and help clean afterwards.

Stop to listen to people, many of them are craving attention and need someone to lend a willing and sympathetic ear. That takes time too, but it's an incredible gift for them.

That is how I live my life. I love every minute of it and I have no regrets whatsoever.  It's intense, it's exhausting, it's demanding, but worth it. 

Pile of Nerves

I need to blog to calm down.

I don't want to drive my husband crazy and hurt his feelings by asking too many questions.

It's hard not to know when he can come home to us from being there with his dad. It think it will be harder when we arrive back home on Friday without him. Maybe not? I hope not. If it is I don't know what to do to cope.

I can't help but worry about how my in-law's travel insurance (which was originally for THREE DAYS! They requested an extension yesterday) will pay or not pay for extended ICU stay (it seems they have a limit of days), not to mention the thought that they probably don't cover rehabilitation costs -- but maybe they have to, depending on the medical condition and the impossibility of travel. and what if they say it can't be extended? Too many scary what-ifs money wise.

Packing is extremely stressful for me, my husband was going to handle that as he does every time. He's a pro.

The shopping lists I have, for me and for friends are long and then after buying all that I have to PACK all those things.

Then there are the sad background thoughts...

... he is only 71. His parents lived extremely long lives (92 and 94, if I'm not wrong). We took it for granted he'd live that long. At least I did.

... his mom died last year after a stroke and being intubated for a long time and resuscitated multiple times. He does NOT want that and has actually discussed these issues before with family members.

... he is way too conscious of everything around. If he recovers, that's great, if not, it's heartbreaking.

yeah

Vacation, Interrupted (short version)

I wrote a longer, more detailed post, but decided to pull it. If you got it in your feed, "good for you" (I used to HATE this expression, sounds so much like "teasig" , at least how it would sound in Portuguese, but now I'm used to it).

Summary of situation: This vacation has been pretty incredible, but unfortunately it's been interrupted by an awful and unexpected event: my father-in-law had a serious stroke soon after arriving in the U.S. for my brother-in-law's doctoral graduation on Friday. It was a three day trip, but now we don't know how long it will last for them.

Last night my husband is flew to Chicago to join his three brothers and mother to be by his father's side (one brother flew from Brazil with his family and the other came from Montreal). We all had a horrible night Saturday night because we received devastating news and were told by the doctors that my FIL was likely going to die or not ever recover. After a few hours of sleep we woke up on Sunday to news that FIL had woken up from his coma, opened his eyes, and could move arms and legs on command. The grumpy and blunt neurosurgeon that had talked to my BIL last night said it was a miracle.

The situation is extremely serious, though. FIL is stable, but he could still get worse. We don't know what the prognosis is. We don't know how long it will take before he can return to Brazil. I haven't talked to my husband yet since he got there, maybe I'll give a quick update after I talk to him.

Please keep my FIL and our family in your thoughts and prayers.

Foggy, Hazy Rio de Janeiro, but Sunny Christ Statue!

This is a photo post. My children have been amazingly blessed this past year in terms of seeing incredible natural wonders: they've been up close to the Matterhorn, the Momt Blanc, and Jungfrau mountains in the Alps; then a few weeks ago we went to the k credible Iguazu Falls and today we arrived at a very foggy & hazy Rio. It was still great (and hopefully better tomorrow) and staying at the local house of friends is very special! 

Bright blue from the back:

Sunny front;

Foggy city below:

This was supposed to be an incredible view of the Sugarloaf mountains:

A few more:

And Incredible sunset with "sea" of clouds:

Looking forward to 2nd & last day tomorrow. 

The Brasil Trip Continues

sorry for leaving the z out, I prefer Brasil with s the way we write in Portuguese :-)

I'm visiting my brother's house for the first time in 10 years! He lived 8 years abroad and I haven't been to Brazil for the past 2.5 years.

A quick summary of the past two weeks: after we arrived back from the trip to the state of Paraná and the Falls, my sons spent a week hanging out with their cousins who are closest in age (sons of "K2" who lives in Egypt). They rode bikes, played tons of WiiU and some Minecraft and we all spent an afternoon making tie-dye t-shirts for ALL the kids in the family -- the 8 grandkids of my in-laws + K's aunt's 2 grandkids and 2 shirts for my twin friends' kids (the two that were there with us), plus two t-shirts for my mom and one for me). And I still dyed a giant towel with the leftover dye.

My sister-in-law was at her mom's house all week with my niece (who is 3 and the cutest, sweetest little girl ever) and nephew (4.5), so I spent as much time with them as I could.

In the middle of the week I went clothes shopping with my mom at a nearby town that has lots of textile factories and stores and we also got hundreds of liters of spring water from a local spring (my parents do that every few months so they don't have to buy good drinking water).

Then my husband arrived on Friday (7/14) and his family members started to arrive, one brother on Saturday and the other o Sunday for the BIG reason for this trip: his grandmother's 90th birthday party and family reunion. My mother-in-law's two sisters and two brothers and their children were there on Saturday already and we had a lovely lunch celebration at her cousin's house. The birthday celebration on Sunday night was awesome and the next day nearly the whole family went to a hot water springs resort a few hours away where we stayed until yesterday (Friday).

It was great, but a lot of the kids got sick with the stomach flu. :-(

I hate to end on this negative note, but this will be a BIG week -- we're going to Rio for a whirlwind pre-Olympics tour!!

Safe, and Frantically Traveling, in Brazil

We arrived safely here on Friday, but the delay made the trip into a 24+ event from leaving our house to arriving at my parents'. The bus we could have taken at noon to go to the town closer to them was full and we could only take the 2pm bus. Thankfully, a dear friend who had come to pick up a suitcase from her mom that we brought, had prepared a big bag of food for us! Such a great gift!

Saturday was a great day spent with family and friends (including the same friend who had gone to the airport), but in the evening when we saw what the forecast was for the week and that a cold front was coming to Iguazu Falls (Foz do Iguaçu -- foz doesn't mean falls, BTW, it means the meeting of several rivers), we decided to leave on Sunday & started packing.

We couldn't leave as early as we wanted, but the trip went well and we reached our friends' house before 7:30 pm. This morning we left earlier and arrived at the Falls before sundown (5:30). Tomorrow we see the falls (five minutes away from where we are!), both the Brazilian and the Argentinian sides. I will share photos in the evening if possible. I need to empty a bunch of photos from my iPhone's memory so I can photograph and blog from the phone.

The best of the trip so far is having Wi-Fi in so many places -- people's houses, restaurants, lodging. That way I can be in touch with my husband and friends & family. Hope to be back tomorrow with more!

Flight delayed

Our flight was delayed for a technical problem, but hopefully now we'll depart uneventfully! 

Leaving for Brazil

Everything went pretty smoothly & the only thing I didn't do was to plant these perennial plants I'd bought one or two months ago. :-( Maybe K can plant them, poor guy! At least last night I put the flowers in pots. 

I had a bunch of last minute shopping to do, but we didn't leave for town until I was 100% packed! (Minus the items I bought and some last minute items of clothing plus the computer external hard drive). 

We came home, finished packing, the kids ate (pizzas I bought them at Target) & K tried to get me to eat some yummy mushroom & truffle ravioli style triangles from Tradwr Joe's I had prepared last night, but I was looking for old photo negatives and trying  not to forget anything. So now I'm starving (and craving the pasta) and I guess I'll have to eat at the airport because the flight doesn't leave until 10:05.

I'm excited about this trip! We all love traveling, the boys are well trained from babyhood & are seasoned travelers. Kelvin has checked the aircraft & he is upset that United downgraded the planes that fly to Brasil from 777 to 767 (well, from Chicago it was 77, probably from here it may always been 767).

Ok, let me talk to my poor husband in the half hour until we get to the airport!

20 Years Ago

20 years ago last Monday (June 20th) K & I arrived in the U.S. with 7 pieces of luggage. 1996! it feels like a lifetime ago, and I guess it is, considering that I was nearly 25 at the time. In a few years I will have lived longer in this country than in Brazil.

Interestingly enough, the past almost 11 years are chronicled here in this blog, it's a pity that most the friends who were reading back then are not anymore. 

Happy 20th anniversary of emigration for us! ;-)

List of Updates

- We drove my parents to the JFK airport in New York on Monday. LOOOONG day driving for over 12 hours. Sigh... They arrived safely in Brazil.

- Car situation still not resolved (and my poor dad super stressed about it). Tank was flushed, but car won't start. Of course it's NOT in the Toyota dealership & I guess the mechanics don't have any experience with hybrids. We're trying to figure out a solution.

- I'm packing to fly to Brazil tomorrow night. I hate packing and the days before trips. So much stress! Thankfully if I forget anything my husband follows in two weeks.

- Boys will miss the last three weeks of swim team, but they have been swimming SUPER well, it's awesome to see. I even want them to swim/have some swim lessons maybe in Brazil (except that we'll be traveling most of the time).

- I STILL HAVE NOT planted flowers that I bought into the vases that I always have by the front steps in the summer. HORRIBLE, no? I should stop blogging and go do it. Sigh...

more later.

On (Almost) Being Ripped Off & Resolution In Sight!

Well, I don't have a lot of time because our friends (who had ADORABLE twins 10 months ago) came up for the wedding (I PROMISE more on the wedding soon) and are coming for dinner.

So... we almost were COMPLETELY ripped off by the Toyota place in Maryland.

SERIOUSLY! And, besides, their estimate caused a lot of sadness and needless worry and despair. So, unfortunately we've already lost 400+ because of this car situation, but, apparently the people in the Toyota dealership where our car was taken to are specialists in ripping off customers.

They wanted to replace everything and would charge us 2,400 when our own Toyota dealership, whom my husband called this morning, said that this accident of putting diesel in a gasoline car is common and NOT serious and that they charge...

... wait for it.

TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY dollars to fix it. (which just involves flushing the system completely)

Isn't that unbelievable?? The other Toyota's place wants to charge 10 times more for unnecessary repairs.

Anyway. Problem is that our car is in Maryland, so a friend of ours who owns a tow truck and a dealership/garage has put us in this list in which tow trucks from all over the country transport cars to other locations for a much cheaper price. We don't know when our car will be transported to our local Toyota, but hopefully it will be done within the next month (my husband travels to Brazil on July 14, we go on June 30).

OK, have to go continue preparing for my guests!

A Sad Post with an Undecided Ending -- What would YOU do?

I need to write his as a sad "coda" to today's earlier update post.

Something very unfortunate happened on Thursday. Our car, my blue Prius (which my husband jokingly calls "Blue Cloud," nuvem azul in Portuguese), broke down with my parents in it, in Maryland.

The whole thing was crazy because I was in town with the kids driving a shift gear car around while on the phone, and having to go to Costco to buy pizza for the guests and my mom & her friend were face-timing us and then calling every few minutes while I was with Geico on the phone trying to sort out the situation. Good thing Kelvin has a phone and could talk to my mom & their friend while I talked to Geico.

My parents wouldn't leave the car and stayed in it for FIVE HOURS until the tow truck arrived. People stopped to try to help them, it was an adventure... (I haven't even heard all the many stories they have). They were stuck on top of an overpass. I deeply regret having allowed them to sit there (while their friends went home -- they could have just gone there) uselessly, but I had guests to cook for and entertain and didn't insist they leave the car behind while the tow truck was on its way. The only good thing was that my mom walked to the Toyota Dealership (VERY CLOSE to where the car broke, just down the street) & checked the car in, giving all the necessary info. (In retrospect I should have told them to have their friends pick them up after that).

And yesterday (after Toyota worked on the car all day -- diagnostic alone is $500) we found out what the problem was/IS. My dad accidentally put diesel in the car. :-(

Fixing it costs more than half of what the car is worth. 2,400 (worth -- in perfect condition, 4K).

Please tell me, what would you do?? Ditch the car? Fix it? Would it even work OK and pass inspection afterwards? -- K read that the catalytic converter can get damaged. We TOTALLY can do without it for now and for a while because we bought a mini-van to drive around with my parents & have a Hyundai Accent. We could also fix it and try to sell it. Or fix it & keep it 'till it dies. What should we do?

My parents are understandably devastated and want to pay for everything. But, what is the best course of action?

I'm just very sad, especially because I didn't want this to have happened to my parents, they've been having such a GREAT visit with us (apart from the one day my mom felt sick). We'll get over it, but right now it's hard. Any thoughts are appreciated.

:-(

I'm Officially Old! 8-(

I need reading glasses!  :-(

/       /
O - O

(I made that up, couldn't find instructions online, though I'm sure they exist!)

However, I don't really need them because it's only in ONE eye!!! (my right eye, +1.50)

I've noticed this lately when using my phone and I'm sure that all the reading on my phone PLUS crazy texting and messaging is the culprit for this.

The eye doctor told me, however, that they may have done this on purpose when I had LASIK: made one eye's correction better so the other eye had a chance to still be slightly near-sighted and not need reading glasses. THAT or my brain being incredibly smart and managing to do that on its own.

In any case, I hope this situation will hold. And, if the right eye is bothering me too much, I can buy a cheap pair and knock out the left eye lens. :-P

I suppose I should be happy I had four great-eye years after getting LASIK in 2012. I'm almost 45, so it's not a surprise I finally have this problem. Do you need reading glasses?

--> So, I created a label for this post. If I really do continue blogging as I intend to, I'll be using it in the years to come.

Crazy Changing (& Traveling & Hosting) Times (and I hate Facebook)

Sigh...

Sorry, but I have to begin with a sigh.

Can't believe it's been 20 days since I last blogged. Unbelievable.

Such few people from my old circle blog today (or read this blog), though, and I don't think I'm picking up any new readers or making any new bloggy friends, that I end up spending a lot of time on stupid facebook. I know I should simply unfollow (-->word not recognized by spell check!) most of the 600+ people in my friend list and stick to old-blogger-friends-who-now-facebook-instead and just not be there, but, yeah... blogging is so... I don't know 2004, 5, 6, 7?

And then there are other apps that allow us to talk to friends and family and too much time on my phone.

OK, quick update because I need to write two or three or more blog posts if I truly want to catch up.

My (next to) last post outlined "the crazy" from the second week of May. Well... it turns out the crazy from June would be CRAZIER than I'd anticipated, with a tragic note (next post).

The whirlwind trip to Massachusetts (for a wedding on May 29, one of those (big, huge) weddings you go to where you only know the bride and two other people, then New York City and a brief stop in Philly/PA was great. We left for New Jersey on Saturday (stayed at a hotel) -- my in-laws were here and went there too since they flew out of NYC on Sunday -- then drove to the wedding and drove back to spend the night in Connecticut. Spent the day in NYC on Monday (visited the MoMA and went up on Top of the Rock) -- that wasn't my youngest son's favorite way of spending his 12th birthday, but it was not like he had any choice. We indulged his wish to not dine in the city (OH, SO SAD! So many delicious ethnic eateries) & ate at Panera close to our friends' house in Long Island.

On Tuesday we drove back to Manhattan to park and visited the Statue of Liberty/Ellis Island (GORGEOUS DAY!!) before walking back to see the 9/11 memorial and driving to Philly to sleep at our other friends' house (yes, we have countless friends at whose houses we stay, that's why we also host countless friends here). And on Wednesday, we went to see Samson at Sight and Sound and visited (our favorite!!) Longwood Gardens in the afternoon before saying good-bye to my parents (who stayed in Philly at our friends' house) & heading back home -- stopping at IKEA for furniture shopping (more on that later) & dinner (with bonus sunset!).

Sigh... wasn't that intense? But it was fun and we had lovely weather.

When we got home, I had to work on my friends' wedding shower of and that was also intense and a big success (with a small group of attendants) & I didn't take enough photos, which makes me sad.

The shower was barely over when my parents came back with our friend and her two kids (7 & 9) -- she had decided to bring my parents back and spend a few days here sightseeing and enjoying her kids second week of vacation in the countryside (they live in North Philly right now). That meant we went to the park, went to the farmer's market and shopping (mostly my mom & my friend, to thrift stores), went sightseeing at other local attractions and to the water park all day on Friday.

Since my older son's dear friend is moving to TN, we invited him to the waterpark with us and on Friday morning had a Wii & WiiU playdate with four loud boys (while my mother was sick in bed with something (some kind of digestive discomfort with nausea and dizziness) -- right next door to the family/TV room). Sigh...

Mom recovered quickly and then... and then we started the crazy process of moving our office from upstairs to downstairs so the boys can have separate rooms!! Yeah, it took me this long to get to the "changing"/moving part of the post that comes first in the title.

IDEALLY, we would have first painted the family room downstairs, then moved everything, then painted Kelvin's new bedroom, then assembled the IKEA furniture we bought, but, we didn't have all that time AND... were going to have guests again this past Thursday, so we wanted to get the bed together ASAP for the guests (twin that turns to king bed -- LOVE IKEA and foam mattresses).

We didn't do the painting, BUT we did ALL the filming. Yeah, this is the house of a YouTuber and, having enjoyed immensely our previous furniture moving time-lapse, we filmed everything again, except that this took a lot of time (WAY less than it would have taken to paint, ha ha ;-) because we couldn't find the tripod (probably lost it), then the memory cards wouldn't work, or the camera's battery would end and need to be recharged. But we finally moved most everything in time for the guests who arrived mid-day on Thursday.

This was my husband's cousin and (newly pregnant!) wife plus three friends & a baby. They all live in Michigan and came for a speaking engagement in D.C. The friend who came by himself is actually practically family to me -- he was the baby of my next-door neighbors when I was growing up in Brazil and his family remained really close to mine, so I've known him from the time he was born (the Seventh-day Adventist church community is really a huge world-wide family, you always know someone who knows someone, all over the world, especially if you're Brazilian!!) :-D

They stayed only 24h and my parents actually left for Maryland not long after they arrived. Their visit included an unexpected rain shower while on a hiking trail (which let to iPhones on rice and rice getting into charging ports and whatnot), but I didn't go on the visit to the park because I had to take the boys to have their vision checked and mine was too (another quick post for that). And yesterday I did stuff for my friends' wedding, picking up mason jars, getting nails done, YAY! loved that part!, shopping for fruit and cakes (YUMMY, can't wait to eat them!!), picking up photo booth, practicing music briefly.

YEAH... CRAZY busy. So, yeah, I'm tired and slept only about six hours, but I'm wired and can't sleep from the moment I open my eyes (generally between 6 something -7 something).

Last, but not least! I worked out three times this week with friends. They do Pop Physique & Barre. I'm lovin' it!! (but I do want to try to go back to doing Yoga every week in addition to that fun ladies' group work out).

So there you go, mostly updated about my (crazy) life!!

Manhattan, I've missed you!

Photo taken from the George Washington Bridge

I used to come visit nearly every year during our 8 years in MA. And for the six years we lived in Philly our Brazilian consulate was here, so we came for passports for the boys and for dropping and picking up up family at the airport. I took the boys to various playgrounds at the Central Park several times & felt like a local even though I lived a couple of hours away.

In 2008, on the way back after my dissertation defense, we stopped here on a whim on Memorial Day and took the kids to this awesome playground with a natural stone slide. I'm thrilled that we're going back on Memorial Day tomorrow, after we attend a wedding in MA today. 

I can't wait! 

Quick update of my "indiscriminate and reckless" helping ;-)

I began to write this last night, but then felt bad that my husband was driving and I wasn't talking to him, so I stopped. And then this morning I wrote the other quick post about NYC.

My life has been crazy & intense three past few weeks. I hadn't even finished turning my last grades in when I began to work on some crafts projects of decorations for my friend's wedding. Since we're traveling this week, I needed to have most everything done before the trip, so I threw myself feverishly and hyper-focused-ly into work after I decided which colors to use (when I talked to the bride) and what to make. After she sees them at the shower next weekend, I want to post photos and share more details!

--> The post's title comes from my an email I sent to my friend when I was feeling guilty for making too much stuff that she might not even like or use (you'll understand when you see the photos). She thought it was hilarious that I talked about my helping that way! ;-)

My parents helped me a lot with those projects and more, but things got crazier when I threw myself head-first (again) into helping with my son's eighth grade graduation. I went completely overboard as usual. I took photos of the 8th graders in class on Friday 5/20 (and spent most of the day at the school as the kids received and signed their yearbook). Photographed them in their concerts at church the next day, went to soccer games on Sunday, and last, but most importantly, took formal portraits in black & white of each 8th grader on Monday.

Then I began to edit the photos, ordered prints at Costco, and continued collecting photos and croping them to create collages for each of the 14 kids while my parents painted wooden photo frames. In the meantime, my friend, whose son is the class president (my son is treasurer) was crocheting a blanket on her spare time as a class gift to the teacher (she works full time, BTW).

Sigh... I had 4-5 hours of sleep every night on these weeks. 

Oh, and did I mention that my in-laws arrived for the graduation on Wednesday,  I helped decorate all day on Thursday (the graduation was that evening), and on Friday, after all of it, I had to take ice cream cake to celebrate younger son's birthday with his class since it was the last day of school & his birthday is May 30.

Are you exhausted yet reading this? But it was all awesome! The graduation reception was very lovely and the children loved it. I even wrote a letter/card for each of them during the ceremony.

Ok. I'll have a photo post now with the few pics on my phone!

Almost over... and, Broken (by the grading)

This year the grading broke me.

I mean, it wasn't the grading, it was the online homework that many students didn't complete that broke me. I didn't check it until the very end, as I usually do (because it's time consuming), but this year, I decided I was going to be more strict and really take points off for late submission. After all, they were aware of the deadline. Until... I realized that several students had NOT done the work.

And some of those were really good students who were doing well. Some of them contacted me after the final yesterday, when they saw the damage their lack of homework had inflicted on their grade. Some of them actually had a good reason -- that made me think that I could maybe bend the rules, but I can't do that for the past, only for the future -- they said that they left the online homework to do before the final so they could use it to study. Fair enough, but still, I had already taken points from everyone for lateness and it would take A LOT of time to go change everyone's grades at this point (8 lessons and several hundred online activities to scroll through in the report).

It's technically their fault, not mine, that they didn't do the work, but I feel horribly guilty and broken nevertheless. I contacted a student (who was not doing that well and who had done next to nothing of the homework, at the time I hadn't yet checked the other students), but I must have written the wrong words, because this student responded back with a negative tone and... worst of all, even after I wrote that the work could be accepted late (but for less credit) this student didn't get the work done. (and didn't do well in the final). It's hard not to feel it's partly my fault, because I contacted the student trying to help and it had the opposite result. :-(

I keep telling myself that even though the assignments are in the syllabus, I should have emphasized in class that they NEED to be done. And I do think I said it a few times. I am quire sure that the students knew that they were 20% of the grade.

I still feel broken. And I feel responsible -- because I was the one teaching more classes than I should and not putting in more time into working with my students.

I'm sad and upset about all this. There is no way to really fix it. I have allowed some students to do the rest of the work for partial credit even though I didn't want to. Students with As on the final exam and Cs on their homework. :-(

This will be bitter a lesson, for them and for me. I wish the end of this semester didn't have to be bitter like this. I hope next school year will be better. I feel this semester was the worst one ever. :-(

Edited to add: I'm feeling a little better and more hopeful after grading some compositions and getting ready to leave everything ready to submit once the "late work" I'm allowing is submitted. Sigh... I hate grading. It's like passing judgment one someone, I just don't like to do it.

My parents are here! After 5 years not visiting.

In the meantime, we visited Brazil twice and met them in other parts of the world (South Africa into 2012 and  in the Middle east and Europe in 2015), but it is so good to have them back at our house for an extended visit!

I am driving home and hoping that they will already be there. We will pick up the boys from school and later on go to their piano recital. That's why my parents came for one evening visit. They return to my uncle's house tomorrow morning, and then come back on Saturday to stay!

I'm very happy!

Edited to add, at 4 pm: they were not here when I arrived, but I'm hoping they will soon be... Sigh... I don't like it that they don't have their cell phone working. I'll let you know when they're here!

5 pm: They arrived!

Should we be freaking out?? :-(

Independents WON'T vote for Hillary, is it possible that a crazed outspoken, racist, bigot, anti-women, billionaire celebrity with no substance and questionable morals could really become president to this nation? :-(

I wish Bernie had a real chance. Independents WILL vote for him. 

What is going to happen? I can't believe it has come to this. But we obviously have had it coming for years.

:-( 

Late!

I can't believe I'm late for my first final exam. :-( 

Class is at 2, exam was at 1 and I was on "automatic pilot" and forgot. 

Sigh... Hope it all goes well.

The Third "Last Day"

This semester I have five "last days" -- last Thursday was the first, the last day of classes at U#1. Yesterday, was the second one, last day of classes at U#2.

Today is the (first and) last day of exams for me at U#1 and I have two days of exams at U#2, this Thursday and next week on Thursday.

Yeah, this CRAZY semester of teaching is drawing to an end, as well as the insane four years of teaching at two universities. I am not at all sad about it all ending, except maybe for earning a bit less (2-3K), but I'll be doing LESS WORK and being paid nearly the same.

I am cautiously optimistic about trying to slowly go back to my main research project (from my crazy 500 page dissertation). I already have a conference presentation in October and I want MORE!! Sigh... the plan is to integrate the research to my teaching and even apply for an internal grant for it. We'll see how it goes. Sigh...

I can't wait to have some free days, but before I have to face all these last days, all the grading and, next week, an intense conference in which I'll be helping out. Probably in exchange for a few free meals and perhaps good interactions and networking, but maybe there will be some payment (if funding comes through for my friend the organizer).

I'm mentally spent, exhausted really. I think this was the worst semester yet, not in craziness of hours of teaching (that was the Fall of 2013 -- utter insanity), but teaching with a brand new book and, "tele-teaching" FIVE days a week (that hadn't happened before, it was always only Tu/Th). This takes a lot of energy, not to mention the stress and claustrophobic feeling of teaching in a room without windows, in the basement of a building (for 4-5 hours straight on Tu/Th -- teaching and then preparing materials, printing, etc).

Today is my last day in the teleconference room. YAY!! I'm moving on and I won't look back (remember I was counting the days?). Phew!!