Monday, October 10, 2005

Dissertatin' - Update #1

Well, since I started working in earnest, and I even have a timetable (I pasted it near my computer screen yesterday, I even added some "motivational" stickers :) I will be updating on my progress periodically.

Last Friday I emailed the first draft of Chapter 1 (Introduction and Methodology) to my advisor. He's sending it in the mail this week (yeah, I know, why not revise it electronically - but he read it very quickly, so I'm not complaining, I think I'm lucky right now). I'm working on a rough draft of Chapter 2 to be sent out this Friday.

Other than that, I'm still recovering from a sore throat and a cold I had last week (must have caught it from you ABDmom, through reading your blog :) I'm pretty hoarse, which I hate, and coughing a bit (which I hate even more).

The boys are OK. I should post some pictures, shouldn't I? I'll think about it. I didn't have time to work on my promised "upcoming" posts, but I'll try to this week.

I feel very energized because I'm being productive. I never thought I'd ever feel positive about writing the dissertation, and I'm surprised by it. I can't help but have a vague dread that this positive outlook will change soon. But, perhaps, if I keep on working and don't let negative thoughts and feeling of guilt get hold of me, I'll be able to 1)feel energized and positive and keep working; 2) eventually finish!
I can't even believe that I may actually finish next year. I hope with all my heart that finishing, defending and graduating (if I can make the April 30 deadline) will feel as good or even better than "getting to work" feels now. I fear that the endless rewriting and revision that lie ahead after I'm done with the first drafts will suck the energy, joy and hope out of me, and then, when I get to the finish line, it will be anti-climatic. How was it to other people I wonder? (anyone reading this is done? how did it feel? Should I hope for a "happy ending" feeling or is it really as anti-climatic as I think it must be?)

I just wish I knew ahead, but I guess I just have to live through it. One step at a time.

5 comments:

DUSIE said...

Good Luck Lilian! It sounds like your really beginning to get into the groove. Believe it or not, reading your post is making me long for school! I never really considered getting a Phd...but who knows what the future holds. I am sick too! It seems to be catching! Oh and damn girl, you sound sooo American, with that funky title and all....

Ana said...

I'm sure it will feel great once you're finished! Good luck and good work!

Alice said...

oh, good luck! I hope the positive energy phase lasts long! :)

Professing Mama said...

OK, Acade(me) is blaming me for her illness, too! What's up with that? Why can't ABDmom get no love? ;)

Hope you're feeling better soon.

Choco Pie said...

Procrastination and avoidance feel awful, don't they? And they make the goal seem impossibly distant. It's great that you're making progress and that it's energizing you. Keep going and you'll build momentum that (hopefully!) will help carry you through the tough parts ahead of you.

Good luck!