Slowly, very slowly... I begin to really like our new house. Not that I didn't like it before, it's just that it is hard, nearly impossible, for me to imagine how it feels like to live in a place for many many years... and I am beginning to think that maybe we will live in this house for a long time (we will? really? the skeptic in me cannot reconcile to this idea).
You see, that never really happened in my life... I've never had a "hometown," I've never known what having a family home (where you spent your childhood) to go back to feels like. A good metaphor for how "unsettled/unsettling" my life is and has been is my "birth country" trauma, caused by the fact that I was born in a country which doesn't allow me to have its nationality.* And then there are the many times I moved (either places or from one rental house to another. Five years was the most I ever lived in one house (I did live in the city of São Paulo for 12 years, but moved a few times during this period). For my husband's family it was worse. We calculated once that in 20 years K's family had moved, I don't know, 13-15 times (including a house or apartment a year in one city).**
A few months ago I was having a hard time thinking that we had finally "settled down" somewhere, but I didn't blog about it at the time because I didn't really know how to say this (not that today I'm going to be any better). In fact, the idea of settling down sounds nearly incomprehensible to me after so many years in my life -- actually, my whole life, all 40 years of it -- moving from place to place and not knowing where I would end up. Unconsciously I keep thinking that we'll sell this house again and move elsewhere and start from scratch once more... because this is just what "normal" is in my life.
The funny thing is that when I met K, my biggest desire in life was to be able to have what I never had -- a stable place, give my children a "childhood home" and roots. However, in these 21 years together, I seem to have changed and become just like K was/is: he has always said that after the first traumatizing move he remembers in his life -- when he was 6 years old and followed by many others -- he just can't stand living in the same place for too long, that he needs new adventures. I had a hard time adapting to that kind of thinking, but when we left Brazil and moved here, I think that changed.
So... as I contemplate many years living in this area, having the boys grow up here (OK, they're pretty grown up by now, poor things, having moved a lot too), I feel torn between that old desire I had of putting down roots somewhere, and the impulse to experience new things.
Ultimately, I don't know what will happen (and sometimes I fantasize about K getting an offer to go somewhere after he gets tenure, but that's sooooo unlikely!)... so the best I can do is to enjoy this house, this region and let those roots grow... after all, we should "bloom where we're planted," right?
* I probably blogged about this before (at least in my 50 things about me posts), but if you don't know the story, I was born in Geneva, Switzerland when my dad was studying in France (right on the border) and my mom was doing an specialization at the University of Geneva. There's only one small detail... Switzerland refused to give anyone born there their citizenship... they're just "too good." As a result, I spent my whole childhood being told "Oh, you're Swiss" and replying angrily -- no, I'm not!! I'm Brazilian!" Sigh...
** Of course I know that it's even worse for "army families" because then it's around the world...
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
I like teaching, but grading...
... is a pain.
edited to add -- I'm sorry, folks!! I'm totally, 100% repeating myself in this post! I already wrote most of this rant on 11/7. Please blame it on NaBoPloMo, OK? (I do have an "extra" here, the link to a previous post about my traumatizing experience of online teaching).
-------------------------
Seriously. Grading papers is SOOO subjective that it drives me nuts! I feel like all I do is "justify" the grade I give in my comments. I can't stand writing comments... I think I sound so hollow, so untrue!
Sometimes I wish I could simply give everyone As, but that wouldn't be honest, that's not part of my job. I need to help students get better at what they're doing.
But when I don't grade and give them back their assignments in a timely manner, I'm NOT helping them!! So... there you go. I'm officially the less helpful professor in the face of the earth (OK, maybe not, I returned one of 4 papers and most of the 2nd paper. A student [not mine] told me today that one of her professors didn't return/grade ANYTHING yet, and it was pretty tragic how hearing that made me feel less awful about myself).
Just for about 2 minutes, though.
The reality is that grading is hard, no matter what. And for me, using a rubric doesn't help much. In addition, electronic feedback -- which I think is ideal -- is a pain for me because of that horrible, no good, very bad experience of online "non" teaching. (I totally have some PTSD from that). (I re-read that post just last week and I was surprised at how strong my feelings were, so many months later... yeah, I was definitely traumatized).
The good thing is that I don't think there's anything traumatizing with teaching in a real classroom and dealing with live, flesh-and-blood "kids." I enjoy that, and I hope the students can sense that. And... maybe, forgive me for procrastinating so much the grading. :(
I'm so lame!! (and "faking" the date today, the first time in over a week, really, so I should be forgiven for that too).
edited to add -- I'm sorry, folks!! I'm totally, 100% repeating myself in this post! I already wrote most of this rant on 11/7. Please blame it on NaBoPloMo, OK? (I do have an "extra" here, the link to a previous post about my traumatizing experience of online teaching).
-------------------------
Seriously. Grading papers is SOOO subjective that it drives me nuts! I feel like all I do is "justify" the grade I give in my comments. I can't stand writing comments... I think I sound so hollow, so untrue!
Sometimes I wish I could simply give everyone As, but that wouldn't be honest, that's not part of my job. I need to help students get better at what they're doing.
But when I don't grade and give them back their assignments in a timely manner, I'm NOT helping them!! So... there you go. I'm officially the less helpful professor in the face of the earth (OK, maybe not, I returned one of 4 papers and most of the 2nd paper. A student [not mine] told me today that one of her professors didn't return/grade ANYTHING yet, and it was pretty tragic how hearing that made me feel less awful about myself).
Just for about 2 minutes, though.
The reality is that grading is hard, no matter what. And for me, using a rubric doesn't help much. In addition, electronic feedback -- which I think is ideal -- is a pain for me because of that horrible, no good, very bad experience of online "non" teaching. (I totally have some PTSD from that). (I re-read that post just last week and I was surprised at how strong my feelings were, so many months later... yeah, I was definitely traumatized).
The good thing is that I don't think there's anything traumatizing with teaching in a real classroom and dealing with live, flesh-and-blood "kids." I enjoy that, and I hope the students can sense that. And... maybe, forgive me for procrastinating so much the grading. :(
I'm so lame!! (and "faking" the date today, the first time in over a week, really, so I should be forgiven for that too).
Monday, November 28, 2011
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Here he is!
I am also worried about baby, mommy & daddy because they are exhausted, he cries a lot, she feels her milk hasn't come in and is very anxious about that (she seems to feel very insecure and anxious in general as new mothers often are, poor thing!). Keep her in your thoughts and prayers, OK? I wish it weren't so hard to have a new baby. :(
(and, seriously, the second time around is WAY better, that's the truth!)
Locked Out
We've been inside our cozy house for less than an hour now, in spite of the fact that we arrived about 11:30 from Maryland.
Today was one of those (fortunately) rare unfortunate occasions in which the stuff nightmares are made of come true. On Wednesday when we left, I made a fatal mistake: I suggested we bring an extra set of keys for the car, one that didn't have the house key in it. K was using that key to drive and had left the other key in the car (between the two seats, on the floor). On Friday, however, when the car was full of my Black Friday shopping stuff, I decided to bring the other key inside the house -- after all, it's not very wise to leave your car keys inside the car, right? RIGHT?
Except that tonight K used the spare key to drive to church, left it in his pocket and reused it again in the evening -- so he never had to pick up the key from the key hooks at brother-in-law's house.
We realized we didn't have our house key until we'd driven half way home. I remembered that we had the garage opener in the glove compartment and didn't stress too much. And then, we often forget one of the back doors unlocked, so I thought that those could be an option.
Well... guess what? Everything that could go wrong went 100% wrong. The garage opener wouldn't work. The other garage opener (inside our other unlocked car, parked in the driveway) didn't work either. ALL doors were locked. There's a balcony off our bedroom and I thought that maybe that door would be unlocked. K climbed on the trash can and hoisted himself up (getting hurt in the process), but NO, the door was locked as well!
We went to the two convenience stores in our small town looking for batteries for the garage door opener, but they didn't have any. We even bought a Phillips screwdriver to try to open the opener, but it was too big and I finally opened it with a paper clip. It was one of those tiny 6V batteries. In the end, we drove all the way to a Wal Mart Supercenter (20 minutes away) so K could buy the batteries. I was napping in the car (while the kids, who woke up when we got home, talked) and when K came back, he asked, what if the neighbor (who was looking after the cats) locked the door from the garage to the house? Oh no! I truly hoped that wasn't true. I slept on the way home and jumped out of the car as soon as we got here. The opener worked and the door was unlocked, PHEW!!!
What a night! K was joking that at least it would be an unforgettable night for all of us and that this would probably never happen again.
Seriously, besides sticking extra house keys in each car, I want to install one of those keypads outside of the garage, it's how we got out of situations like this in our rental house and our last house in Pennsylvania.
Good thing I got to talk to my brother on skype, though! It helped that we were still up. I will write the post about their experience (pretty interesting, as a matter of fact, more cultural differences in maternal and newborn health care) tomorrow. And it might even include a photo of the baby!!
Well, good night (for me)... good morning for my readers!
Today was one of those (fortunately) rare unfortunate occasions in which the stuff nightmares are made of come true. On Wednesday when we left, I made a fatal mistake: I suggested we bring an extra set of keys for the car, one that didn't have the house key in it. K was using that key to drive and had left the other key in the car (between the two seats, on the floor). On Friday, however, when the car was full of my Black Friday shopping stuff, I decided to bring the other key inside the house -- after all, it's not very wise to leave your car keys inside the car, right? RIGHT?
Except that tonight K used the spare key to drive to church, left it in his pocket and reused it again in the evening -- so he never had to pick up the key from the key hooks at brother-in-law's house.
We realized we didn't have our house key until we'd driven half way home. I remembered that we had the garage opener in the glove compartment and didn't stress too much. And then, we often forget one of the back doors unlocked, so I thought that those could be an option.
Well... guess what? Everything that could go wrong went 100% wrong. The garage opener wouldn't work. The other garage opener (inside our other unlocked car, parked in the driveway) didn't work either. ALL doors were locked. There's a balcony off our bedroom and I thought that maybe that door would be unlocked. K climbed on the trash can and hoisted himself up (getting hurt in the process), but NO, the door was locked as well!
We went to the two convenience stores in our small town looking for batteries for the garage door opener, but they didn't have any. We even bought a Phillips screwdriver to try to open the opener, but it was too big and I finally opened it with a paper clip. It was one of those tiny 6V batteries. In the end, we drove all the way to a Wal Mart Supercenter (20 minutes away) so K could buy the batteries. I was napping in the car (while the kids, who woke up when we got home, talked) and when K came back, he asked, what if the neighbor (who was looking after the cats) locked the door from the garage to the house? Oh no! I truly hoped that wasn't true. I slept on the way home and jumped out of the car as soon as we got here. The opener worked and the door was unlocked, PHEW!!!
What a night! K was joking that at least it would be an unforgettable night for all of us and that this would probably never happen again.
Seriously, besides sticking extra house keys in each car, I want to install one of those keypads outside of the garage, it's how we got out of situations like this in our rental house and our last house in Pennsylvania.
Good thing I got to talk to my brother on skype, though! It helped that we were still up. I will write the post about their experience (pretty interesting, as a matter of fact, more cultural differences in maternal and newborn health care) tomorrow. And it might even include a photo of the baby!!
Well, good night (for me)... good morning for my readers!
Saturday, November 26, 2011
New Baby!
I wish I had a photo to go with this post, but my brother hasn't seen one yet. My nephew was born today at 10 pm (5 am here) in New Zealand and everything went well (except the need for an episiotomy). Dani weights 3.5 kg -- 7.7 lbs, or, in the stupid (sorry, I really think so)* system you use here, 7 lbs 11 oz and it looks like he's nursing well, has dark hair and is calm (for now!).
My mom is reporting back what she hears from my brother -- who called her as soon as the baby was born and then again at 9 am their time [on Sunday] (4 pm Saturday here), while his wife was resting -- but I hope I can talk to him in the next few days. My sister-in-law's mom and dad couldn't be at the birth (or... I don't know, maybe they didn't want to?) and by the time my brother called my mom the second time, they hadn't yet seen the baby. (I understand that some couples want that, but I have the impression that these were probably requirements of the hospital there and not my brother and SIL's choice). My brother also said that he won't give anyone the telephone number of their hospital room just yet because his wife is very tired and a bit stressed out.
After hearing their experience, my mom is simply delighted with how my births were here in the U.S. -- she was with us both times (in addition to a family friend when Kelvin was born), we were all nice and comfortable in the birthing room, listening to the music we brought from home, and friends and family (including my 2 year old) were able to come see me and the new baby very soon after he was born (I don't know how it is in New Zealand, but in Brazil children don't go into hospitals -- I don't know if they'd make an exception for a sibling). When Kelvin was born, K stayed with me overnight in the hospital, but when Linton was born, my mom stayed, because K was home with Kelvin who was still pretty young 2 years 3 months).
In any case... I'm really happy my nephew was born, but a little impatient because I don't know much about him and how it went. I can't wait to see his little face! After each of my births, we called my brother from the birthing room and I have photos and video of me talking to him and telling him about how it went. Oh well... he has his wife and son to worry about, I know how those first few moments and days are, so I shouldn't be frustrated, right? My apologies if I'm coming across that way.
* Seriously, I think the metric system is way better, I've learned to live with lbs, oz, miles, Fahrenheit (the worst!!), but I can barely stand it. As for babies, everyone I know who is Brazilian American gets their babies' pounds/oz wrong when reporting back to their anglophone friends because it's just so complicated -- the geek in me goes crazy when people assume that the .7 pounds equals 7 ounces because they don't. Now, as my husband says, you guys really know your fractions because of your system (and we know our decimals).
My mom is reporting back what she hears from my brother -- who called her as soon as the baby was born and then again at 9 am their time [on Sunday] (4 pm Saturday here), while his wife was resting -- but I hope I can talk to him in the next few days. My sister-in-law's mom and dad couldn't be at the birth (or... I don't know, maybe they didn't want to?) and by the time my brother called my mom the second time, they hadn't yet seen the baby. (I understand that some couples want that, but I have the impression that these were probably requirements of the hospital there and not my brother and SIL's choice). My brother also said that he won't give anyone the telephone number of their hospital room just yet because his wife is very tired and a bit stressed out.
After hearing their experience, my mom is simply delighted with how my births were here in the U.S. -- she was with us both times (in addition to a family friend when Kelvin was born), we were all nice and comfortable in the birthing room, listening to the music we brought from home, and friends and family (including my 2 year old) were able to come see me and the new baby very soon after he was born (I don't know how it is in New Zealand, but in Brazil children don't go into hospitals -- I don't know if they'd make an exception for a sibling). When Kelvin was born, K stayed with me overnight in the hospital, but when Linton was born, my mom stayed, because K was home with Kelvin who was still pretty young 2 years 3 months).
In any case... I'm really happy my nephew was born, but a little impatient because I don't know much about him and how it went. I can't wait to see his little face! After each of my births, we called my brother from the birthing room and I have photos and video of me talking to him and telling him about how it went. Oh well... he has his wife and son to worry about, I know how those first few moments and days are, so I shouldn't be frustrated, right? My apologies if I'm coming across that way.
* Seriously, I think the metric system is way better, I've learned to live with lbs, oz, miles, Fahrenheit (the worst!!), but I can barely stand it. As for babies, everyone I know who is Brazilian American gets their babies' pounds/oz wrong when reporting back to their anglophone friends because it's just so complicated -- the geek in me goes crazy when people assume that the .7 pounds equals 7 ounces because they don't. Now, as my husband says, you guys really know your fractions because of your system (and we know our decimals).
Friday, November 25, 2011
Nephew Watch 2011 -- Contractions Started
All the way across the globe in New Zealand, my nephew is coming!! My brother emailed us about an hour ago to let us know that the contractions have started.
We're all praying that all goes well. My sister-in-law is really apprehensive, particularly about feeling pain. Her mom and dad are there with them and my mom wishes she could be too.
I'll keep you posted!
We're all praying that all goes well. My sister-in-law is really apprehensive, particularly about feeling pain. Her mom and dad are there with them and my mom wishes she could be too.
I'll keep you posted!
Crazy Tired from Shopping
I have to blog now because later I may be too tired to do it.
My sister-in-law and I went to the stores (Kohls & Target) at 1 am. Then we headed to JC Penney at 4 (I bought next to nothing there) and came back home close to 6 am. I got up at about 9 am and left again, this time for Costco and Trader Joe's. Then I went to the mall (crazy crowded) where I shopped at Gymboree, got lost walking around and came back home.
Now my sister-in-law and my husband (who stayed home and slept all night -- but according to him he woke up very often) are napping and I'm here trying to stay awake. Sigh. My brother-in-law (who had his own shopping spree this morning at Macy's -- beautiful and really affordable suits!) took the boys to the park and I'm really thankful for that!
What did I buy? At Kohls, a couple of big throws for our new living room (solid brown & caramel), a blazer for my husband, some gifts for the boys and a few other things... and going to Target was pretty much useless (I wanted a fire-pit, but an hour after opening, they were all gone. :P At least I bought a nice immersion blender -- which I thought was the one one sale, but which it wasn't. Booo... At JCP I bought a pair of red gloves & some funky tights and waited for my SIL to do her shopping.
I'm calling my aunt now, we want to go there and see her and my uncle (the one who had brain surgery two years ago).
I hope you guys had a great Thanksgiving! Ours was great... I'm just awfully exhausted, but I think it was worth it.
My sister-in-law and I went to the stores (Kohls & Target) at 1 am. Then we headed to JC Penney at 4 (I bought next to nothing there) and came back home close to 6 am. I got up at about 9 am and left again, this time for Costco and Trader Joe's. Then I went to the mall (crazy crowded) where I shopped at Gymboree, got lost walking around and came back home.
Now my sister-in-law and my husband (who stayed home and slept all night -- but according to him he woke up very often) are napping and I'm here trying to stay awake. Sigh. My brother-in-law (who had his own shopping spree this morning at Macy's -- beautiful and really affordable suits!) took the boys to the park and I'm really thankful for that!
What did I buy? At Kohls, a couple of big throws for our new living room (solid brown & caramel), a blazer for my husband, some gifts for the boys and a few other things... and going to Target was pretty much useless (I wanted a fire-pit, but an hour after opening, they were all gone. :P At least I bought a nice immersion blender -- which I thought was the one one sale, but which it wasn't. Booo... At JCP I bought a pair of red gloves & some funky tights and waited for my SIL to do her shopping.
I'm calling my aunt now, we want to go there and see her and my uncle (the one who had brain surgery two years ago).
I hope you guys had a great Thanksgiving! Ours was great... I'm just awfully exhausted, but I think it was worth it.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
I LOOOOOVE Thanksgiving!!
After a rather unusual Thanksgiving last year (we went to the beach!), I'm delighted to be back to our Thanksgiving tradition of years back -- spending the holiday with K2 (Klebert's younger brother) and his family.
Exceptionally, this year we were ready with the food ahead of time! And we're just waiting for our guests, a Portuguese family celebrating their very first Thanksgiving in the U.S. They're bringing a codfish dish (bacalhoada) which we can't wait to taste!
Our four boys are downstairs playing the Wii and we are all very hungry, awaiting the best part of the day.
Well, the guests are here, and I will write another post later.
Exceptionally, this year we were ready with the food ahead of time! And we're just waiting for our guests, a Portuguese family celebrating their very first Thanksgiving in the U.S. They're bringing a codfish dish (bacalhoada) which we can't wait to taste!
Our four boys are downstairs playing the Wii and we are all very hungry, awaiting the best part of the day.
Well, the guests are here, and I will write another post later.
42
Only 42 posts more and I will reach my goal of posting more than last year! That sounds imminently feasible now, YAY!
Now... if only my nephew could decide to arrive into this world! This suspense is not very easy for my sister-in-law and brother to deal with.
The pies are baked for tomorrow already, and I made the sweet potato praline dish too! Gotta go to bed so we can be thankful for all the food tomorrow! ;)
Now... if only my nephew could decide to arrive into this world! This suspense is not very easy for my sister-in-law and brother to deal with.
The pies are baked for tomorrow already, and I made the sweet potato praline dish too! Gotta go to bed so we can be thankful for all the food tomorrow! ;)
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Getting Better
I love Lepton's tongue in this pic:
And Quark's sharp "embrace" in this one:
" 'Cause it's his turn, but his brother won't let him try..."
wow... this sentence is half of my life as mother of two young boys.
but it was the beginning of the song that moved me (the part above it's very close to the end, which is also the same as the beginning):
The previous post sent me looking for cool stuff in Youtube since I'm woefully out of touch with contemporary pop music -- very loosely defined in this post as "music people are listening to now that is popular and/or good" -- with very few exceptions (e.g. Adele & Cold Play). Youtube is OK and all (lots of trash too), but I'm delighted that Spotify came along -- now I can listen to lots more great music without having to sift through bad resolution or cover videos.
In any case, I'd heard of Regina Spektor a while ago, probably through a post in my my sister-in-law's blog (she has great taste in music -- BTW, I'm glad you liked the brownies and other food [scroll down for photo] I cooked! As you know, I really enjoy cooking for company, not so much for only us ;) -- I'm looking forward to Florida already!). But I'd only heard one of her songs, I think, the great "Laughing With." So a couple of days ago I listened to a lot of her songs, both in Youtube & Spotify and though I don't really like many, some are awesome, e.g. "Samson":
I love the Narnia books and have been enjoying the movies (didn't like Dawn Treader too much, though :( ), but I didn't know that Regina Skpektor's "The Call" appeared at the end of Prince Caspian!
I still haven't bought any of her music, but I hope to be able to listen through Spotify and maybe someday I'll buy it too.
but it was the beginning of the song that moved me (the part above it's very close to the end, which is also the same as the beginning):
it's like forgetting the words to your favorite song,* sorry, I can't embed it.
you can't believe it, you were always singing along
it was so easy, and the words so sweet...
you can't remember, you try to feel the beat
....eet.... eet.*
The previous post sent me looking for cool stuff in Youtube since I'm woefully out of touch with contemporary pop music -- very loosely defined in this post as "music people are listening to now that is popular and/or good" -- with very few exceptions (e.g. Adele & Cold Play). Youtube is OK and all (lots of trash too), but I'm delighted that Spotify came along -- now I can listen to lots more great music without having to sift through bad resolution or cover videos.
In any case, I'd heard of Regina Spektor a while ago, probably through a post in my my sister-in-law's blog (she has great taste in music -- BTW, I'm glad you liked the brownies and other food [scroll down for photo] I cooked! As you know, I really enjoy cooking for company, not so much for only us ;) -- I'm looking forward to Florida already!). But I'd only heard one of her songs, I think, the great "Laughing With." So a couple of days ago I listened to a lot of her songs, both in Youtube & Spotify and though I don't really like many, some are awesome, e.g. "Samson":
I love the Narnia books and have been enjoying the movies (didn't like Dawn Treader too much, though :( ), but I didn't know that Regina Skpektor's "The Call" appeared at the end of Prince Caspian!
I still haven't bought any of her music, but I hope to be able to listen through Spotify and maybe someday I'll buy it too.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Drip, drip, drip
It's raining here and today, because of the rain, I was reminded of how one of our "crumbling Hondas" -- the "younger" one, the Odyssey -- is leaking oil. Every spot I parked, even if just a few minutes, had a shiny "rainbow" colored stain mixed with the rain water coming from under it when I came back to the car.
It wasn't my imagination either. When I got home, I opened the garage and moved the car inside for a couple of feet so I could check the oil (we try to check often and constantly add more). I moved it out after less than 10 minutes so I could close the door and let the cats out of their carrier (I put them there so they wouldn't run our of the garage) and when I came inside and closed the door, there were a few drops of dark oil on the garage floor.
:(
Part of our big financial worries right there. I keep hoping, against logical thinking and hope itself, that these cars can last until we can afford to get new ones. Maybe they can, maybe it'll all be fine in the end, who knows.
Meanwhile... I feel guilty every day for polluting the environment and filling our waterways with horrible oil. (it seems that the leak cannot be fixed, unfortunately) :(
P.S. Thanks for your lovely supportive comment, Aliki. It's precisely what I needed to hear. I am at peace with the expenses and 100% sure that my "babies" are worth every penny. It's just that I have horrible anxiety & issues with money and K & I always have the hardest time talking about it.
It wasn't my imagination either. When I got home, I opened the garage and moved the car inside for a couple of feet so I could check the oil (we try to check often and constantly add more). I moved it out after less than 10 minutes so I could close the door and let the cats out of their carrier (I put them there so they wouldn't run our of the garage) and when I came inside and closed the door, there were a few drops of dark oil on the garage floor.
:(
Part of our big financial worries right there. I keep hoping, against logical thinking and hope itself, that these cars can last until we can afford to get new ones. Maybe they can, maybe it'll all be fine in the end, who knows.
Meanwhile... I feel guilty every day for polluting the environment and filling our waterways with horrible oil. (it seems that the leak cannot be fixed, unfortunately) :(
P.S. Thanks for your lovely supportive comment, Aliki. It's precisely what I needed to hear. I am at peace with the expenses and 100% sure that my "babies" are worth every penny. It's just that I have horrible anxiety & issues with money and K & I always have the hardest time talking about it.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Children of Deported Parents & Pepper Spray
nothing like checking the news to put things into perspective, right?
I had always asked myself what happened to these children and this organization gives the heartbreaking answer. (see video below if you want)
In addition, I hadn't checked my Twitter feed since Friday and hadn't listened to/ checked the news so I didn't know about the pepper spraying of students at UC Davis -- how awful! Here's the interview of a victim and a discussion of how strong pepper spray is.
Last, but not least, Jo(e) wrote a great post about social media and the OWS movement. It's good that the world is watching, what effect will this exposure have?
I had always asked myself what happened to these children and this organization gives the heartbreaking answer. (see video below if you want)
In addition, I hadn't checked my Twitter feed since Friday and hadn't listened to/ checked the news so I didn't know about the pepper spraying of students at UC Davis -- how awful! Here's the interview of a victim and a discussion of how strong pepper spray is.
Last, but not least, Jo(e) wrote a great post about social media and the OWS movement. It's good that the world is watching, what effect will this exposure have?
can't
I can't really blog today.
I mean, I'm a big over-sharer, but I need to stop it at times and this is one of them. I will just say a few things, but not discuss them.
My cat (I think it's only one now, but I can't know without spending significant time with them in the garage) is still vomiting, in spite of the fact that the vet thinks they're both fine and after I spent several hundred dollars there today (b/c I decided to go ahead and the the whole feline leukemia thing. worried mother preyed upon).
My mom is worried about my dad's health and I don't like that.
Spending money I don't have on the cats that I shouldn't have in the first place has caused me too much grief today (after I talked to K).
bye
P.S. (I can curb the over sharing, but not the prolix tendencies) and I have to go to bed early b/c I woke up at 4 am worried about the cats and spent the rest of the night in the garage with them (I brought in a mattress & blanket, but there's a heater in there, so it's nice & warm)
I mean, I'm a big over-sharer, but I need to stop it at times and this is one of them. I will just say a few things, but not discuss them.
My cat (I think it's only one now, but I can't know without spending significant time with them in the garage) is still vomiting, in spite of the fact that the vet thinks they're both fine and after I spent several hundred dollars there today (b/c I decided to go ahead and the the whole feline leukemia thing. worried mother preyed upon).
My mom is worried about my dad's health and I don't like that.
Spending money I don't have on the cats that I shouldn't have in the first place has caused me too much grief today (after I talked to K).
bye
P.S. (I can curb the over sharing, but not the prolix tendencies) and I have to go to bed early b/c I woke up at 4 am worried about the cats and spent the rest of the night in the garage with them (I brought in a mattress & blanket, but there's a heater in there, so it's nice & warm)
Sunday, November 20, 2011
Sick Kitties
(sigh)
My cats (who just had surgery last Wednesday) are vomiting and I'm pretty stressed out. I'm glad they are still playful and acting normal, so it shouldn't be too serious, but still... it's a worry.
To make it worse, I found out (and I'm so upset at myself for not having paid more attention earlier -- I did feel a lump after the surgery on Wed, but didn't look closely) that there's a huge tick on Lepton's neck. :(
Thankfully, I called our friend and vet and she called me back and gave me advice -- their office is actually open tonight and I can take them in!
(too bad that we may miss a Nutcracker concert we were planning on going, but I will try to go anyway!)
So, yeah... it's not easy to "parent" pets. Easier than children, for sure, but still stressful at times.
P.S. In a sense it's OK that K left early this morning for a conference, because he's always quick to remind me of the consequences of my choice to have pets ("See? I told you it would be a problem!") in typical "guy" fashion. Not very supportive at times. :( And I will tell him all that, BTW, I generally don't write anything in the blog that I wouldn't say to anyone's face (at least I not anymore!! ;).
My cats (who just had surgery last Wednesday) are vomiting and I'm pretty stressed out. I'm glad they are still playful and acting normal, so it shouldn't be too serious, but still... it's a worry.
To make it worse, I found out (and I'm so upset at myself for not having paid more attention earlier -- I did feel a lump after the surgery on Wed, but didn't look closely) that there's a huge tick on Lepton's neck. :(
Thankfully, I called our friend and vet and she called me back and gave me advice -- their office is actually open tonight and I can take them in!
(too bad that we may miss a Nutcracker concert we were planning on going, but I will try to go anyway!)
So, yeah... it's not easy to "parent" pets. Easier than children, for sure, but still stressful at times.
P.S. In a sense it's OK that K left early this morning for a conference, because he's always quick to remind me of the consequences of my choice to have pets ("See? I told you it would be a problem!") in typical "guy" fashion. Not very supportive at times. :( And I will tell him all that, BTW, I generally don't write anything in the blog that I wouldn't say to anyone's face (at least I not anymore!! ;).
Four Cousins and a Dream
My parents and I reconnected with Deni back in 2003 when 10 years had passed since we had last seen here -- it was so nice! I last saw her six years ago when she briefly visited us in PA, but I want to plan to see her again soon.
I really want to some day be able to write a sensitive, moving and, hopefully, beautiful account our childhood together, but I will try to quickly summarize the events that brought the lives of my cousins Deni & Joce and mine and my brother's together for the sake of this post.
D & J are the children of one of my dad's sister, the one that was always closest to my mom. D is a couple of years older than me, J is only four months younger than me and was my classmate from 7th-12th grades. Coincidentally D, J & I were all born on the seventh day of the month!
When J & I were six and D eight, their father died in a horribly tragic car crash and as a result of that, D & J spent nearly all their vacations with our family in the years that followed and then in 1985 we moved to São Paulo where we were, literally, their neighbors. They are like brother and sister to me and I love them dearly.
I have a dream... a dream of taking another photo like the one above. Of having the four of us together again. Just thinking about this makes me want to cry tons.
Well... today I found out that D is planning to go to Brazil for Christmas next year. My brother is going as well with his family and I'd been planning and dreaming of going so I could meet my nephew, but now, I have even more motivation to make an effort to go (in spite of the fact that we're going to Brazil in July/August next year and airfares are super expensive). I hope I can make this dream come true!!
Note: I wrote this post listening to Pat Metheny because back in 1996 Joce gave us their CD Still Life (Talking)
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Saturday, November 19, 2011
51 - uma boa ideia :)
Since I have 51 posts to go 'till I reach my goal of surpassing last year's number of posts*-- not counting this post, obviously, so it is actually 50, I thought I'd write this post about Brazil's most famous brand of cachaça (pronounced kah-shah-ssah) or hard liquor, also derisively nicknamed as pinga. I thought it was "a good idea" (this drink's famous slogan), in spite of the fact that I never tasted the stuff & never intend to. It's part of my country's culture, so I always tell my students about it. In addition, cachaça is used to make the famous Brazilian lime-based drink "Caipirinha" (if you want it with vodka, it's a caipiroska).
* by one, I can try to add a little more if I can.
South Africa, here we come...
It is certain now, our family is going to South Africa for nine days during our Spring Break next year to accompany a small tour group led by my mother-in-law (who owns a small travel company in Brazil). She is sponsoring the trip for K & I because we will be translators/interpreters to the group on the tours we do there (last year K's brother "K2" and his wife did that too).
In spite of the fact that the boys' Spring Break doesn't coincide with ours (it's two weeks later!) we decided to bring them along since we think this is a unique opportunity for them to go to Africa -- especially because my parents will be going on the trip as well (on their way to New Zealand to meet my new nephew). In addition, Kelvin's 10th birthday will be right in the middle of the trip, on the day we'll be arriving at a lodge in Kruger Park. I think it'll be an unforgettable birthday for him!
Now we just need to work hard to getting used to the South African accent so we can be effective interpreters. Last night when I talked to my brother on Skype he and his wife recommended that we watch movies set in South Africa and I think it's a good idea. Any suggestions? My brother said he's email me some links, I'm thinking that we can start with an older film such as Cry Freedom
and maybe Color of Freedom
and Invictus -- although these last two have mostly American actors, I don't know if that would be helpful
. My brother & SIL also recommended what they said was a weird "alien"/scifi movie, but in which the accent would be great for us (meaning, authentic ;): District 9.
I guess it will be nice to try to be prepared. And also talk to the boys about the painful history of that country before we go (maybe we should try to find children's books about South Africa). Sigh... it's easy to say all this, but doing it is harder. I guess I'll go edit my netflix queue right now!!
Note: The lack of the exclamation point at the end of the post's title is due to the fact that the boys' airfare that I just charged to my card yesterday will be added to our current debt and I'm not too thrilled about that (MIL is reimbursing us for ours this week), but like the commercials say... it'll be priceless (I just didn't pay with MC, but with V ;).
In spite of the fact that the boys' Spring Break doesn't coincide with ours (it's two weeks later!) we decided to bring them along since we think this is a unique opportunity for them to go to Africa -- especially because my parents will be going on the trip as well (on their way to New Zealand to meet my new nephew). In addition, Kelvin's 10th birthday will be right in the middle of the trip, on the day we'll be arriving at a lodge in Kruger Park. I think it'll be an unforgettable birthday for him!
Now we just need to work hard to getting used to the South African accent so we can be effective interpreters. Last night when I talked to my brother on Skype he and his wife recommended that we watch movies set in South Africa and I think it's a good idea. Any suggestions? My brother said he's email me some links, I'm thinking that we can start with an older film such as Cry Freedom
and maybe Color of Freedom
and Invictus -- although these last two have mostly American actors, I don't know if that would be helpful. My brother & SIL also recommended what they said was a weird "alien"/scifi movie, but in which the accent would be great for us (meaning, authentic ;): District 9.I guess it will be nice to try to be prepared. And also talk to the boys about the painful history of that country before we go (maybe we should try to find children's books about South Africa). Sigh... it's easy to say all this, but doing it is harder. I guess I'll go edit my netflix queue right now!!
Note: The lack of the exclamation point at the end of the post's title is due to the fact that the boys' airfare that I just charged to my card yesterday will be added to our current debt and I'm not too thrilled about that (MIL is reimbursing us for ours this week), but like the commercials say... it'll be priceless (I just didn't pay with MC, but with V ;).
Friday, November 18, 2011
My Nephew is Coming!
I'm late posting today because we just spent a couple of hours talking to my brother and sister-in-law on Skype. When we said good-bye, my nephew was moving around in his mama's uterus and I talked to him a little big.
I hope he arrives soon! (due date's on Monday, 11/21) My sister-in-law is really afraid of the pain and of giving birth, so I'm praying that all will go well.
I need to sleep now, more tomorrow!
I hope he arrives soon! (due date's on Monday, 11/21) My sister-in-law is really afraid of the pain and of giving birth, so I'm praying that all will go well.
I need to sleep now, more tomorrow!
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