Friday, December 09, 2011

Busy, Relieved, Worried

Busy
Well, this word is a bit too weak to describe this week. Yesterday was the busiest day, by far, so, a quick summary: I arrived at the university at 9:45 and administered 3 oral exams before teaching ,my 2 last classes, from 11-1:45. Then, three more oral exams and a meeting of 1h30 with two students who need looots of help. I barely eat on Tu/Th because I teach right over lunch time (and I don't like/can't [IBS] have breakfast, so that's a problem for me. I generally eat a plate of food during my 11 am class). In fact, I've been so busy this semester that I've been buying frozen food, like the 1.50 pasta & vegetables on tasty sauces that I can find at evil-superstore-that's-open-24h-and-in-which-I-shouldn't-shop or the nice and yummy organic & vegetarian dishes of Amy's kitchen, which is what I ate yesterday (enchilada verde, my favorite).

I had to be getting ready for a performance in church (more on that in a second) at 5 pm, but I only left the university at 4:50! I ran home to put on a few more layers of clothing and to "grab" my family that was going to participate too. We were a bit late [it started at 5:30], but it was OK in the end. You see... we're doing this huge Bethlehem town representation for five nights. It involves hundreds of people and it's really nicely set up with a great script (it takes about 45 mins. to go through) and I'm a poor widow (with my youngest son), my oldest son is a school boy with a small speaking part and my husband will be the Inn-keeper for a few nights. The whole thing goes from 5:30-9:15 or later every night until Monday. Sigh... We've had several nightly practices in the past weeks (even before Thanksgiving), and the last was on Tuesday (and on Monday I cooked to help feed a group of homeless that is given shelter in various churches around town, so Wednesday was our only "free" night this week). It does feel good to be helpful, though.

If all that weren't enough, my mother- and father-in-law are coming tonight to spend the weekend, so K & I were cleaning the house until 1 am last night, mostly because today he has to work and go to a holiday party (until roughly 4 pm -- remember that by 5 we have to go to the performance!) and I have to go shopping for food and other necessities since I didn't have time at all the whole week! I should be mopping my kitchen floors right now and yet I'm blogging (I need some "therapeutic" me time to help  me keep sane in all the busy-ness). But... I'll try to have an hour for myself later today too.

Relieved
Remember those bad news? Well, they were about my brother-in-law and there's some good news to supplement those. He's had the first surgery (prior to the news), then a CT scan -- which scared him more than anything -- and which came back negative, no metastasis anywhere else in the body! Which is great news, since that makes it more treatable. His second surgery was on Tuesday and it was successful. He will undergo radiation therapy in January. The only thing is that it seems that he's feeling much more pain and other side effects of the medication (nausea) than he did after the first surgery, so I hope he can recover and feel better soon.

Worried
I'm really really worried about my sister-in-law, my brother, and the new baby (in that order). I think Andi Buchanan's phrase "Mother Shock" is too weak for what they're undergoing, really... and I feel sorry that there's nothing that we can do to help, since it's hard to even talk to them and just talking won't help relieve their sheer shock, exhaustion, etc. My poor SIL was diagnosed with acute anemia after the baby was born. She is being treated, but the extra exhaustion brought by that condition, added to not sleeping, etc, is just too hard on her. Then, she couldn't take the pain of breastfeeding and suffered greatly until she was given nipple shields.

We only talked to them last week on Saturday when they took & sent us some photos and skyped with us briefly. All I hear is through my mom, who's communicating briefly with my brother every day. Ever since the baby came, my SIL realized she cannot sleep -- she gets stressed out about the baby being OK. My brother is trying to help, but he's working full time and her parents are there, but they only help during the day... The latest I heard is that the baby is crying up to an hour a day -- they think he might be colicky!! -- :(  I hope that's not the case, but if it is, I just pray that they can survive. Of course we all know they will... but... I feel for them and worry. Especially because I had it so (comparatively) easy -- well, I never wrote in the blog in detail about the nightmare of Kelvin not nursing/latching on for a month and me pumping for that whole time. I will try to do that someday. It's always been too difficult to even remember.

So... yeah, I wish I could feel simply happy about the birth of my nephew, but that's not to be. :( I wish the birth of a new baby could be easier on the parents and family, but it never is. So many people (SIL especially), worry so much about the labor and delivery, but those are nothing, really compared to what comes after, there's nothing that can prepare you for a new baby, NOTHING. That's why there's this sharp division in the world between those who are parents and know and those who don't. There's no way the latter can ever understand the former, seriously.

All right, that's enough for now, I have to do some mopping and run to town for food shopping. (outrageously ridiculous rhyming, I know, and not on purpose, I swear!).

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