Thursday, April 14, 2005

In love with my babies... or baby & big boy?

These past few days I've been sooooo infatuated by my cute, cute, cute 10 month-old! Not that I haven't been crazy about him all along, but there's something about these babies who can crawl to you when you call them, and climb on your legs/knees/lap, and smile their most delighted grin (with spaced teeth on top) that makes them super endearing.

If you've ever had a wedding, you'll remember how tired your lips and mouth felt after smiling non-stop for hours at all those people, cameras, etc (not that you weren't happy, mind you). That's how my own smiling mouth felt yesterday at the playground, when Linton went on the swing for the first time. What an irresistible grin on his face, what giggles! I couldn't help but smile until I was tired, but couldn't stop myself from smiling, cooing and giggling right with him!

Problem is -- this unbearable cuteness makes me want to have another baby, and another one after that... Nothing against large families, the more the merrier, but we most probably cannot aford one, and we've always planned having only two kids. Oh, and on top of that crazy desire is the whole thing with girls. Let me explain, my husband has 3 brothers. My in-laws kept trying to have a girl and ended up with 4 boys. So far they have 3 grandSONS, so everyone wants a girl. Besides, I've always wanted one myself, even though I'm happy with my two boys, and I keep thinking, what if we did have a girl? No, I'll take no chances and end up with 3, or 4 boys like my mother-in-law.

Meanwhile, my 3-year-old is becoming a big boy, even though, small as he is, he still looks very much a baby (we think that his brother probably will be as tall as him in a year or two, and they're 2 years 3 months apart). I like of the way Catherine Newman describes this growing up of the oldest child,
here , and in her book (p. 31): "Babyhood is falling away from Ben in huge chunks. He's like a molting snake, shedding first his diapers and now, it seems, his trusty afternoon nap."

Kelvin is partly potty trained now (pees OK in toiled, but asks for a diaper for pooping), and last Tuesday I moved his toddler bed into his own room. He had already been sleeping there for over a week, in the futon we have for guests, and I thought it'd be a good idea to move his bed from our bedside, and he even helped me do it. I'm surprised at how easy it was, I wish weaning was easier too (he still nurses once, sometimes twice a day). Oh, yes, and most days he's not napping either, and has not even been too cranky at the end of the day (I'll admit, sometimes he is - the funny thing is that today he was crankier than most days because he had a nap - it always happens with me when I sleep in the afternoon, I understand).

Anyway, both of them will grow in no time, and, like my friend's husband says - it's no use having another baby to replace the one that's growing, in the end they all grow up... and it'll be a long time before we can become grandparents (oops! isn't it too early to be thinking about that at 33? But there are thirty-somethings who are grandparents. In Brazil there's this soccer player [Casagrande] who had a daughter when he was 15, and she had a baby when she was 15!).

Well, those have been some of my thoughts lately...

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