My birthday is coming up and I'm feeling really sad about it

We were supposed to be in Florida for my birthday, but of course it was too good to be true. Sigh... (scratch that sentence, typical "realistic pessimist/ pessimistic realist"[whatever!] point of view).

Well, the problem is that I was looking forward to spending the day with a dear friend with whom I spent so many birthdays with in my teens (we met when we were 13!). I will never forget the surprise birthday party that she, her sibling and some other friends put together for me in freshman year of high school. And the many other surprise birthday parties that we organized together for other friends... Sigh again...

The worst part is that her sibling lives very close to us, but they are no longer really in touch with us  and that's sad.* We always considered them as some of our closest friends.

OK, I can't blog about this, I am going to end up crying, it's no good. I wish there was something we could do, but there is not. And I can't say more. Not only because I wouldn't know what to say (see below), but also because it's a sensitive issue I shouldn't even be blogging about. They don't read this blog, though. And, if they read, at least they would find out how sad this whole mysterious situation makes me feel.

Sigh... there are a few options, I could throw a party to myself, but that's kinda weird and as much as I'd like to do something (rainbow themed!) I don't think I will. My dear wonderful amazing husband is truly wonderful, but it's an understatement to say that he's not good at organizing parties, surprises, events (or even buying gifts, for that matter) and I'm OK with that... I love him the way he is and he does enough for me at it is at home. But it's sad that I don't have friends that can do something nice for me. I love the one Brazilian friend I have here, but this person is pretty unique & overwhelmingly busy with her family (in-law) most weekends.

I have to try to think positive. I have contacted some friends and I know they could come over (even though they have out of town guests)... I don't think we're going out to eat because the restaurant I want & was planning to go to in FL (Maggiano's Little Italy) is too far away and...

... whatever. This is frustrating. And I know it's just because I always want to have or do something special for my birthday, but it just hasn't worked out in the past few years. (several, many, years?)

I know it's just a day like any other, but still...

OK, another pathetic post brought to you by my need to use the blog as therapy. Sorry about that! We'll soon go back to regularly scheduled programing. Promise!

P.S. to compensate, I'm buying several cute things for myself. I will write an upbeat post about that later, OK? ;-)

*we know from family connections that something upset my friend over two years ago, but we can't even apologize because we don't know what we did wrong. I shouldn't be blogging about it, but I need to. I've been overcome with sadness regarding this issue on and off since we found out months ago. At least we don't need to get puzzled & upset that they're not in touch. We know something's up. Sigh... So we don't even call or message or anything so things won't be awkward. In person meetings in church have been cordial, but we haven't seen them in a while.