I was away from "blogland" for two days while at my brother- and sister-in-law's house. I was able to check email, but didn't stay online for long since my husband had taken our laptop for his job interview. Besides, I had to watch the boys and help my SIL.
The campus interview went really well, thankfully. He even visited the elementary school we would probably send our son to if we were to move there.
Wow, did I just say that? Sending my son to school?
Well, first of all, we know it's premature to start thinking of moving there, but one just can't help but imagine how it would be. My husband brought with him some touristy materials (maps and booklets) and a real state pamphlet. Looking at those houses in the car on our way back home I started wondering what would our prospective house look like. I feel happy that we would be able to (finally) get a bigger place, a one family home.
Mostly, though, I thought about my son. And school.
I really really wish I could be a more organized person and home school him. I know about "cyber schooling" too, a friend of mine just told me all about it just two weeks ago. I think it wouldn't be the best for us, though, or for him, since I just don't have confidence in my abilities to be disciplined and organized for both of us. Besides, I think he would thrive on the structured environment of school. I feel so torn about this!! Part of me feels that he's so young (he'll be 5 and a half in September) and that having my son away from me for seven hours is just an excruciatingly long time. I miss him already, just thinking about it. Aliki just wrote a beautiful post about similar issues.
If my husband does get an offer, I will look for a job there too, but if I don't have a job and just have to stay home with my youngest, I think it will feel very sad to have my oldest in school when I could be teaching him at home. Could I pull it out?
Besides, I cringe just thinking about having to get up really early everyday to drive him to school (we would have to drive him there, or car pool). If I worked then I think it wouldn't bother me at all, but if I don't... oh, that won't be easy!
Well, there will be many many changes, that's for sure. I've been looking forward to most of them, but I hadn't really thought about this school thing. Today though, as I held the packages from the school (with registration information, the rules and regulations, etc), this reality became very palpable to me. And I've been giving my son extra hugs and cuddles ever since, as well as talking to him about school. He's OK about it, but not that interested in this conversation. He'd rather talk about his upcoming Bob the Builder birthday party (we decided the theme at a dollar store yesterday!). I guess he's right. We have to concentrate on more immediate events.
In three weeks or so we'll know. And then the real excitement and worrying begins!
Yes, Lilian, I can totally relate. Of course, we are homeschooling but there is always the open-ended question mark that lingers about whether someday they will go to regular school. Although our primary motivation for homeschooling wasn't my sadness to see them climb those school stairs, it is something that was on my mind as we made our decision. I'm sure it stirs every mother's heart. A friend of mine who used to be a Kindergarten teacher said that the funny thing was that 90% of the time, the kids were like "yippee, this is going to be fun, look at all the toys and the other kids" while the moms were sobbing outside the door worried about their kids and how they were doing.
ReplyDeletePersonally I think you'd do a great job homeschooling and although it all depends on personality, etc. I think it is much easier than many think. I spent a year reading every book I could get my hands on about homeschooling... I was obsessed. And then one day I knew we could do it and wasn't worried anymore and that was that (well, I do still read Home Education Magazine and a homeschooling book every now and then). Now I focus on providing a multitude of educational materials for the kids and making sure to be there for them when they beg me to "do homeschooling" which is all the time. Plus, we are also hooked up with our local non-denominational homeschool group (i.e. no religious focus) and the parents in the group provide more gatherings and activities than we could ever possibly attend.
I should add, though, that all three of our kids are in an in-home daycare three days a week with wonderful providers and 9 or so other kids of all ages. So, they get a lot of time with other kids which means I don't feel like I need to provide that as much. In the fall we are probably going to make some changes just because P will be the oldest and the other older kids will have gone to Kindergarten. But we haven't worked out the logistics quite yet.
Either way, your husband's job interview is extremely exciting and I am sure you will make the right decisions and find the strength to see them through no matter what they are.
Crossed finger. Or, as they say in parts of Europe, I hold my thumb for you. Excited anticipation.
ReplyDeletewow, Lilian, exciting changes coming up ahead!! I was going to refer you to Corey regarding homeschooling but I see that she's already answered. All I can say is that I have deep respect for all those who homeschool. I have neither the patience, endurance nor creativity to do this myself. It's an interesting topic. Keep us updated on your decisions!
ReplyDeleteSo much happening! I so wish I could homeschool Liam...for many different reasons. I wouldn't doubt yourself--if you can stay home and you have the real urge to homeschool then maybe you should take the plunge?
ReplyDeleteI'll keep my fingers crossed for all of you! Thanks for the kind words about my post, too...
Here's just an in-between suggestion: instead of full-day kindergarten, have your son attend half a day. Usually kindergarten isn't required, so choose what you like! We did this with our son and with the full support of his teacher. Her opinion was that full day kindergarten was for the convenience of working parents. After the first week or two of picking him up immediately after lunch, we had his classmates begging us to go home with us also. My husband and I felt the time in the afternoon with the three of us was invaluable and it was.
ReplyDeleteAnd, what did we do the next year? Homeschooled him!
KarenM in NC